“No?”
“No, so unless you tell me not to, I’m gonna kiss the hell out of you.”
“I’m never going to tell you that. I think about you kissing me all the time.”
I didn’t need any more encouragement. I hooked him closer and slid my hands over his hips as he leaned down to meet me. Our lips touched, brushing softly together at first, but then harder as I settled in for the ride.
Toby tasted of fresh air and salt. And his skin was still damp from the shower. I squeezed my legs around him and felt him harden against me. His kiss was sweet fire. Tugging him into the van and on top of me would’ve been the easiest thing I’d ever done, but somehow I managed to resist. I kissed him until I ran out of breath and it was time to go home.
9
Toby
Shadow liked me. As much as he liked anyone, at least, and since Joe’s sister had left the farm, his list was short. Only Joe could ride him, but he usually allowed me in and out of his stall without too much violence.
Usually. But today was my turn to get shoulder barged to the ground as he charged past me and made a break for it.
Joe made a grab for him. Missed and wound up in the dirt like me.
Shaking his head, he got up and opened the gate, leaving the big stallion to gallop a free path to the fields. “Shitbag. He’s getting worse, I swear.”
I scrambled to my feet and dusted myself off. “He misses Emma. Sorry he got past me, though. He caught me off guard.”
“Don’t worry about it. He had me over yesterday.”
“Didn’t kick you, did he?” Dread squeezed my heart. Shadow had kicked Joe before, more than once, and nearly killed him. I didn’t dream about him pale-faced and unconscious in the mud anymore, but that day still haunted me, almost as much as it haunted Harry.
Joe clapped a warm hand on my shoulder. Younger me would’ve blushed at the casual touch, but these days I had Cole’s hands to match it to, and Joe’s affection felt as it should—like he was the friend-slash-father figure I’d always needed. “He hasn’t tried to boot me for ages. Think he’s too old for that shit now. Don’t worry about it.”
He walked away before I could remind him of the first lesson he’d ever taught me—that no horse was ever too old to kick your teeth in. And I let him go, distracted by the fact it was five o’clock, and for once I had no desire to hang around.
I packed up the tools I’d spread around the farm throughout the day and jogged home to the outbuilding I rented for pennies from George. There wasn’t much to it, but it was clean and tidy, and not owning much stuff meant I had everything I ever needed without having to look far for it. I took a shower and dressed in clean clothes. Then sat on my bed and tried to remember the Pilates schedule at the clinic and factor in the possibility that Cole might’ve wanted to eat before I knocked on his door and took my clothes off.
Thinking about it so literally felt ridiculous, but I was too caught up in anticipation to care. I lay back and let my mind drift to the kisses we’d shared at the beach. They didn’t seem connected to the hour I’d spent rolling around on his bed with him, but I was perhaps even more obsessed with the sensation of his lips on mine in the setting sun as I was with how his cock had felt against my back.
I always felt the most like myself when I was outside. Kissing Cole at the beach had blown my mind. I couldn’t remember why we’d stopped. If it had been him or me to call time and suggest we went home. I remembered him kissing me goodbye, though. A brush of lips to my cheek that had stayed with me ever since.
Weirdo. You’re hooking up with him, not marrying him.
Hooking up. Wow. There was a phrase I’d never used for myself, even with girls.
Women. You’re not a teenager anymore.
Man, my head was a weird place to be.
I went back to thinking about Cole, who was definitely all grown up. There was nothing boyish about his dark beard and sharp gaze. He spoke quietly, but I reckoned he didn’t miss much. Maybe that was why I often felt like he saw every thought that ran through my head before I did. How else would he have known that I needed these... lessons from him so badly? That I wanted them. That I wantedhim.
Er, perhaps because you blush like an idiot every time he looks at you?
Yeah. Maybe it was that. It made more sense than telepathy.
Time dragged on, but eventually, it got late enough for me to hoof it back to the farm. Joe was in the fields, bringing the oldies in. I went the long way so he wouldn’t see me and slipped through Cole’s gate.
The back door was open. I gave it a light tap and ducked inside, shutting it behind me. The cottage smelt of incense. The closed blinds and candles gave the place a glow that stoked warmth inside me, and I let instinct take me upstairs to Cole’s bedroom.
More candles greeted me. Cole was on the floor, stretching his body on a mandala rug, shirtless, with his hair loose around his shoulders.
Without thinking, I kicked my shoes off and left them in the doorway. I dropped to my knees and ran my fingers through the silky chestnut waves. “Wow. It’s so soft.”
