“Aye?”
“Are you okay?”
Brix nodded slowly and withdrew, bringing Calum with him until they were both upright. “I was just thinking . . .”
“Thinking what?”
“That we need to leave. Now.”
“. . . we need to leave. Now.”
Five words had never excited or terrified Calum quite so much. He let Brix lead him back inside to murmur hurried good-byes to Lena and Kim—and Lee, whose smug grin was almost unbearable. Then they left the pub and made their way home in a loaded, companionable silence, walking just close enough that their hands brushed from time to time, setting Calum’s already tingling nerves on fire. He kept his eyes on the path ahead and tried to recall the last time he slept with Rob. Couldn’t. It was like his time with Brix so far, and the tenuous promise what could be to come, had erased years of cold, detached sex that had pleased no one and meant nothing.
Brix preceded Calum through the gate and unlocked the front door. The cottage was dark, and Zelda’s amber eyes gleamed like smouldering embers. She jumped down from the windowsill and stalked to the kitchen, trusting someone would follow to where Dennis was likely already waiting. Feeling somewhat dazed, Calum did just that, because whatever was to come wouldn’t happen until the hungry felines were satisfied.
He filled the cat bowls, absently petting Dennis as he squeezed past. For a brief moment, the weight of the world narrowed to nothing but the cat’s lumbering bulk. Then Brix slid his arms around Calum from behind and pressed his lips to Calum’s neck, and all bets were off.
Calum spun and fell into Brix’s arms, pushing him away from the counter and into the table, shunting it along the floor. The scrape of wood on tile was startling and loud, kick-starting the rapid acceleration in Calum’s heart, propelling him forward again until Brix was bent back on the table in much the same way Calum had been the wall in the car park.
But he didn’t have the upper hand for long. Brix moved like a snake, shoving Calum with a strength that belied his slender arms. Calum hit the counter, then lurched sideways as Brix slammed into him, his kiss bruising and searching, his hands grasping at any part of Calum he could reach—his hair, his face, his chest.
Calum steadied them and took a breath, but it was a lost cause. Something clicked—exploded—in his brain, and all conscious thought was gone. His heart raced, his skin tingled, and every facet of his being needed Brix naked as fast as humanly possible.
They staggered to the stairs, clothes flying, tripping on every step until they hit the landing and tumbled to the floor. Calum took the fall, Brix on top of him. He laughed, but Brix silenced him with another frenzied kiss that took Calum’s breath away. Calum rolled them over, then scrambled to his feet, taking Brix with him and shoving him towards the nearest door, which happened to be Brix’s bedroom.
Brix pushed Calum onto the bed and yanked his jeans down his legs, tossing them aside before kicking away his own. He crawled over Calum and retrieved lube from the bedside table, and then he froze, clutching the lube bottle like it was an unexploded bomb. “Cal, I—”
Calum stared up at him, lost in his wild eyes. Brix was the bravest motherfucker he’d ever known, but the fear in his haunted gaze was heartbreaking, and Calum heard the silent plea like Brix had screamed it in his ear.
Help me.
Calum sat up and gripped Brix’s shoulders, gently tipping him onto his back. Brix hit the mattress with a gasp, but remained pliant and slack, despite the tension in his sinewy limbs, and the terror in his eyes faded slightly as he gave himself up to Calum’s tentative control. Now what?
“Wait here,” Calum said. “I’ve got a couple of rubbers in my wallet.”
He left the bed and dashed downstairs to grab his wallet from his coat pocket. The condoms had been tucked in there so long he had to check they were in date, but thankfully they had six months left.
Condoms in hand, he hurried back upstairs. Brix hadn’t moved. Calum crawled onto the bed and laid a hand on Brix’s chest, absorbing his stampeding heart. A dozen scenarios flashed through his mind. He’d imagined himself naked with Brix more times than he could count, but never once had he pictured himself on top.
Could he do it? Calum had no idea. The last person he’d fucked had been his girlfriend at the time, and he’d hadn’t loved her anywhere close to how he loved Brix—
“Cal.”
Brix’s ragged whisper brought Calum back to reality. He bent and kissed Brix deeply, slowing the heady rush of heat between them enough to catch his breath and ease his racing mind. His hands found Brix’s hair and curled around his skull, like he could draw the demons out, crush them between his palms, and in that moment, he kissed Brix like he’d never kissed him before. Claimed him. Pulled him from the shadows and into the light.
At least, that’s what it felt like when Brix broke the kiss with a shaky smile that spoke a thousand words. “Will you fuck me?”
Yes. Calum reached across Brix for the condoms and lube, and then scrambled back, sitting on his heels, and rolled a rubber onto his dick as Brix pried the lube from his fingers.
Brix squeezed lube onto Calum’s cock, coating the condom and then himself in a gesture so intimate Calum’s every nerve burned his soul. Then, with them both prepared, Brix lay back, his body open and ready, his arms wide, waiting for Calum to finish what they’d perhaps started all those years ago.
Unbidden, a flash of the day they’d first met intruded on the moment—Brix looking much the same as he did now: ageless and beautiful, with his wise eyes that had seen too much. And then there was himself, fresh-faced and juvenile, gazing at Brix like he was the first bloke he’d ever seen. And maybe he was . . . because Brix was definitely the only man who’d ever truly seen Calum.
The only man Calum would ever want to.
Calum knelt in the cradle of Brix’s thighs and aligned their bodies, pressing cautiously against Brix, testing the resistance. His body screamed at him to push in hard and fast, like Rob had done to him so many times, but his heart moved him slowly, and gently, as if Brix were made of glass: strong and pure, but fragile.
Tight heat enveloped him. He closed his eyes and slid all the way in, swallowing Brix’s gasp with a kiss that went on forever, waiting for Brix’s signal . . . a signal that came as the tiniest flex of Brix’s hips—an infinitesimal movement that sent shockwaves through Calum. He groaned, dangerously close to exploding before they’d even begun.
