“No don’t worry, I know how to uphold my oath, Shannon. I barely see him.”
That’s true enough, when Noah is at home it gives Jesse time to himself, to get back to work. When I do see him, I try not to think of him as a patient.
“He isn’t due for a follow up for four months.”
She nods, then comes in and closes the door, sitting down opposite me. I’m not sure what this is about until she gets the face she used to make when dad first got ill.
“How are you doing?” she asks. “With everything.”
“I’m good Shannon. You don’t need to worry about me. I’m not going to lie and say I’ve moved on and don’t think about him. I still don’t go a day without thinking of him.”
“This guy is making it less difficult. Does he know?”
“Yeah, we’ve talked about it. Shannon, trust me, I’m fine.”
“I’m glad, honey. It’s nice to see the old you back.”
Her words stay on my mind as the day goes on. Noah isn’t making me forget, he’s making me cope with it better. Seeing him with Oscar makes me happy. He still thinks he isn’t being the best father he can, but he doesn’t see what I do.
My mind takes a sharp left turn to the other night. It didn’t matter to me that he was trying to show the different side of him. As far as I am concerned Noah doesn’t have two sides, there is no good and bad, he’s just him. Maybe that makes me a fool or people will think I’m blind to what he does but the part of him that cares for Oscar, for me, hasn’t dulled.
After my shift Noah texts when I get in the car.
Noah:
Want to come over tonight?
Taylor:
Over what?
Noah:
You’re a dirty girl
Taylor:
You bring it out in me. And yes. I’ll go straight there if that is okay?
Noah:
I’ll let Jesse know
Taylor:
Did you talk to him?
Noah:
Don’t worry about him Cherry. He likes you, and he loves me
Taylor:
I’m worried he doesn’t like us together
Noah:
He’s coming around. GTG
