She closes her eyes, and I hate seeing the tears that fall down her cheeks. I take a deep breath and power through.
“All my life, I’ve lived by one rule: control everything or lose everything. I fought tooth and nail to survive my father’s mess, my brother’s death, the Bratva politics that were rigged long before I was born.”
My hands flex on my thighs.
“The Bratva was all I ever had. They raised me and supported me when I had nothing else. I knew that as long as I was in charge, I’d always have a family.”
A harsh, self-loathing laugh escapes me.
“But that wasn’t true. Not even close. I see that now.”
She opens her eyes, and the sorrow there guts me.
“Samuil, last night doesn’t fix?—”
“It wasn’t meant to fix anything,” I interrupt gently. “Last night broke me, Molly. When you were taken, when I thought you might be dead or hurt…”
My voice cracks, and I have to take a deep breath to continue.
“I realized what itreallymeans to have a family. To love someone so much that you’d set the world on fire for them. Almost losing you made me realize that I can’t lose you. I wouldn’t survive it.”
Her breath trembles.
“I’m not going to let you get hurt again,” I tell her with all the conviction I can muster.
She shakes her head. “You can’t promise that,” she says through tears. “Your world is too dangerous.”
“It won’t be my world anymore.”
That makes her go completely still. Her eyes widen, and her jaw goes slack. I take her hand slowly so she can pull away if she needs to.
“I’m stepping back from it all,” I tell her, cementing the decision I made the second I saw her chained against that wall.
She blinks slowly, like she can’t quite comprehend what I’m saying. “What?”
“I’m turning the day-to-day operations over to someone else. I’m keeping my legitimate holdings and cleaning up the rest of the business. I’ll keep my distance from the illegal operations. I’ll appoint a second-in-command who will handle what I won’t anymore.”
Her brow furrows. “You’d do that for me?”
“Of course I would,” I answer earnestly. “I thought I didn’t know who I was without the Bratva, but Molly, I don’t know who I am withoutyou. Last night made that very clear for me.”
Her chin trembles, and I lean closer.
“You were right,” I say softly. “About everything. I can’t protect you in the life I was living. So I’m changing the life.”
A tear rolls down her cheek.
“I don’t want you to do this because you feel guilty.”
“I’m doing this because I love you,” I say simply. “Because I love our child. Because some things matter more than power.”
Her breath catches. “You really love me?”
“I never stood a fucking chance,” I tell her, reaching up to stroke her cheek. “And it’s too late to save myself now.”
She laughs despite her tears. “I love you, too,” she whispers.
Her words nearly knock the air out of my lungs. I take her face in both hands and kiss her forehead, her cheeks, her trembling lips.
