I exhale slowly through my nose. If anyone else had told me Natalie wanted to wear my property cut, I wouldn’t believe it. But this came straight from the horse’s mouth. And her expression is as serious as a heart attack.
Just when I realize I’m at a loss as to how to respond to that, she changes the subject on me.
“Do you think we’re bad people for drinking and chatting while my brother is hooked up to life support?”
I freeze with my glass halfway to my mouth. Her words feel like a damn gut punch. I struggle to find the words to respond. “Well, I’ve thought about that myself. I can’t say it feels right. But there’s nothing we can do right now. I don’t have anything he needs to get better, and the hospital won’t let my hefty ass sit in ICU with him. I would love to just be there for him. But he needs doctors and nurses right now, not an overbearing best friend to hassle the doctors and nurses all the time. You know?”
She nods but I can see she’s blinking back tears. She covers it by drinking down the last of her amaretto.
I hold out my hand to her, “Come on,” I say. “Let’s head upstairs and hit the sack. I wasn’t fuckin’ joking about it being a long day.”
Natalie glances at me. “Are you saying I need my beauty sleep?”
I snort a laugh, tugging her off her stool. “No. If you were any more beautiful, I’d spend all day beating the club brothers off you with a stick instead of just catching the brazen ones out back.”
She doesn’t hesitate to take my hand and comes with me. She seems more amused than offended by my little joke. Of course she doesn’t realize it’s not an actual joke.
With Rick in hospital, I’ve moved into her suite, taking his room. The minute we’re inside the suite I go to take a shower. I need space, because now that she said it out loud, I’m obsessed with the idea of Natalie becoming my old lady and I need to stroke one off to the image of her running around in my property cut. If I don’t get rid of the sexual frustration, I might do something stupid like make her wish come true.
Steam fills the bathroom quickly as I stand at the sink with my hands braced against the counter. She said I was easy on the eyes. I can’t get my head around that. I’ve always been seen as a gigantic problem, literally. They said I was too big for as long as I can remember. Not one single person ever said I was easy on the eyes. Looking in the mirror, I can’t see it, so I guess she was just being nice. When I push back off the sink and pull my t-shirt over my head, I realize that Natalie is watching me from the doorway.
Standing there with my shirt in my hand, I feel exposed, like she knew I came running to get a cold shower because of her. Now she’s behind me staring at the Savage Legion MC club tattoo covering my back and I can’t help but flex my muscles a little.
“You don’t have to hover in my peripheral,” I tell her. “If you’ve got something to say, say. I don’t bite.”
“Well, I actually do have something to say.”
I turn my head slightly, studying her reflection in the mirror. She doesn’t look uncertain, upset or impulsive. There’s a steadiness in her gaze as her eyes roam over my tatted up back and arms. This is a woman who knows what she wants. I just wish I knew too.
“I don’t know what you want from me, Nat.”
She steps fully into the bathroom and closes the door behind her. The click of the latch tells me she plans to stay.
“You already know what I want.”
I watch her for a moment longer, then toss my shirt into the hamper, feeling the air shift as her gaze follows the movement. Turning around, I take a step closer to her, thinkin’ she’ll be intimidated by my size and take off. But she doesn’t.
“You want to talk,” I guess, using what little intelligence I have. “Women love to talk. You talk with each other, strangers on the street and with us. So, let’s hear it. What do you want to talk about?” Deep down inside I know it’s about being my old lady, but I could be wrong about that.
“I want to shower.”
Relief surges through my chest. “Goddamn woman. If you wanted to shower first, you should have just called it.”
“No. I want to shower with you.”
The strongest feeling of need gnaws at my gut right now. Wanting me to say yes, to feast my eyes on her lovely form and finally know every detail of her body. I’m so caught up in that fantasy that I don’t answer immediately. I turn back towards the sink, giving myself a second to get my head together.
“You’ve had a long day,” I tell her. “You’re not thinking clearly.”
“Yes, I am.” Judging by the tone of her voice, I’d say she was pretty certain of herself.
“Being naked together is a slippery slope. It might lead to other things.” I try to phrase it not to out myself as the pervert I so clearly am.
“Oh, I’m counting on that.” I hear her footsteps, as her feet move against the tile.
I take a step back, although all I want is to gather her up in my arms and never let her go.
Suddenly, she surges forward until she’s standing right beside me. She’s close enough for me to smell her perfume. I watch in the mirror as she pulls her shirt over her head and tosses it towards the hamper. She removes her bra as well.
