Rita shook her head. The kiss was simple yet charged. It wasn’t fireworks or grand declarations, just the soft press of lips between two human beings on a deserted beach.
Slowly, their bodies drew closer, the world narrowing until there was only the rhythm of breathing and the gentle brush of skin on skin. Fingers traced tentative paths along arms and backs, learning the map of one another, careful, reverent.
It wasn’t messy or desperate like the passion Jilly joked about, with none of the wild abandon of a Sarah Stratton inRivals. It wasn’t the confusion of Jago Jenken and everything he represented. No, this was something quieter, something deeper.
Moving together with an unexpected ease of familiarity, Paul’s hands cupped Rita’s face, thumbs brushing over her cheekbones as he kissed her again, longer this time, softer, the kind of kiss that saysI’m herewithout needing words.
And in this one magical moment, Rita let go.
Let go of Jago saying he didn’t want to see her again, of her own son not believing in her, and of the unsettled feelings stirred by Archie’s missing will. Let go of the past, the pain and the fear that had held her back for so long.
And as the waves whispered along the sand, she gave herself permission to explore another’s body, and to be explored, until, with a soft cry of long-held yearning, Rita’s body spilled over in quiet surrender.
As the tears began to fall, Paul pulled her into his arms, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. Then, as if in rhythm with the ebbing tide, he began to rock her, whispering, ‘I’ve got you, babe.’
Above, a lone seagull cried out.
THIRTY
Rita was dreaming of being on the Pyramid Stage at Glastonbury with a microphone in one hand and a red rose in the other singing a duet with a tall, dark-haired man wearing a red and black lumberjack shirt. The audience were all cockerels who looked like Nigel, and she annoyingly couldn’t make out the face of who she was duetting with, as they had sunglasses that literally covered their whole face. She was just about to pull off his disguise when her alarm pierced the fantasy like an out-of-tune bass guitar.
Groaning, she rolled over and patted blindly for her phone: 5.56 a.m. Four whole minutes before she needed to be vertical. She stole them all, plus a sneaky fifth, then heaved herself up and out of bed, with her eyes squinting like a reluctant mole emerging from its hole.
Remembering what had happened with Paul the night before, she groaned again and messaged Kelly ordering her to ring her as soon as she got her message. Then she made her way to the bathroom. Before Rita had even a chance to open the toothpaste, the sleepy voice of her best mate greeted her.
‘You all right, Reet?’
‘Fine, fine. But let’s just say, last night I gave one of the guests a bit more wellness than I probably should have done.’
Kelly laughed, then made an oof noise. ‘Oh my God, I know my Ron ain’t no oil painting, but I can’t imagine that big beer belly bashing against mine. Reet!’
Rita laughed. ‘Oh my God, it wasn’t Michael.’
‘Sunglasses Man? You lucky dog. He’s hot!’
Rita made a screeching noise. ‘On the beach, like a harlot. We didn’t like… go the whole way but it was enough to make me realise that I do missitand I’ve still gotit.’
‘I can’t even tell you how jealous I am. How was his cock?’
‘So weird touching a different one after all these years, but it was lovely; he was lovely… just gentle and considerate.’
‘Enough now. The envy is real but joking aside, how are you feeling, mate? That’s a big step.’
‘Is it too soon, do you think? I just worry people might judge… like I’m moving on too fast.’
‘No one knows but me, do they?’
‘No, of course not.’
‘Then keep it that way. People will always have opinions and probably those who’ve never been through what you’ve been through would be the most vocal. But at the end of the day, you’re the one living with this. If it brought you a moment of peace, then it was the right time.’
‘Aw, thanks, mate. I cried afterwards.’ Rita let out a low moan. ‘So embarrassing!’
‘I would have done, too, tears of complete joy after not having had it for so long.’ They both laughed. Kel softened. ‘Sorry, Reet. I’m not downplaying this. How did he react when you did that?’
‘Just hugged me tighter. He is so the perfect free spirit for this to have happened with.’
‘Good, I’m glad. So glad, in fact, I was worried that, in the words of the Mad Hatter, you were losing your muchness and it sounds very much like your muchness is well and truly on its way back.’
