It was Kara’s turn to groan. ‘Oh no!’
‘This is the reason I like staying sober.’
‘Well, you’ve done it now. You’re not the first and you won’t be the last to do that so there’s no point beating yourself up about it.’
Star looked like she might cry. ‘It didn’t even get through to him. The email address he had when he worked with your sister, well, there was an out-of-office automatic response saying he’d left the company. There were no more details. So that’s it now. Short of loitering around outside the Dakota Building in New York, where I can only assume he still lives, I have no means of contacting him.’
‘Good.’ Kara licked clotted cream from her top lip. ‘Mmm, this is so lush.’
‘Good?’
‘Yes, good, Star. It’s obviously not meant to be. Forget about him now and have some fun. Wasn’t it your mum who used to say to us when we were teenagers that in order to get over someone, you had to get under someone else?’
‘And look what happened when I listened to that advice. Hello, Skye!’ Star finally managed a smile. ‘I know what you’re saying is right but “The heart has its reasons which reason knows not” and all that.’
‘Yeah, OK, but maybe just change the word “heart” to “fanny” on this occasion and give him a chance.’
Star couldn’t help but laugh. ‘You’re so wrong.’
Big Frank was back behind the counter and, with his huge shoulders shaking with mirth, he eavesdropped as Kara told her best friend, ‘Conor is obviously into you and he’s right here, right now. He’s not some unavailable bloke who is miles away and involved with someone else.’
‘I suppose you’re right. It scares me though, Kar.’
‘I know it does, but rock the new cock, I say. Looking at the size of him, I bet he’s got a huge one too.’
Ducking down behind the counter, Frank was by now silently crying with laughter.
The redhead drained her coffee. ‘Shit, is that the time? I need to get to work.’
‘What are you like?’ Star shook her head at her friend. ‘And wait a sec, I drove down, so come up with me.’
Kara was just fiddling around to locate her seat belt when her fingers encountered something on the floor of her mate’s Smart car. She held up a neatly hand-rolled cigarette to her nose and took a sniff. ‘Weed? I thought your dope-smoking days were over, missus.’
‘Give it here.’ Star grabbed it and put it in her bag. ‘Skye borrowed the car last night and said she wanted to visit Mum. You wait until I talk to the pair of them!’
‘How do you know Estelle gave it to her?’
‘My mother thinks nothing of shoving ten tons of toxins down herself but she still insists on using those organic unbleached brown papers. Of course it’s her.’
‘Don’t be too hard on Skye,’ Kara said. ‘She’s just experimenting. Think what we were like as teenagers – and well before we were her age.’
‘Exactly! And you don’t want her turning up at work stoned.’
‘Star, mate, I think you’re overreacting. She probably has an odd joint with her mates.’
‘You really don’t understand, do you?’ Star burst into tears.
‘Oh, darling. What’s the matter?’
‘I try to do everything right. It’s been hard not having a proper mum to support me, and I don’t even know who my fucking dad is. I have never met my maternal grandparents either. My grandad was a shit, evidently. I actually hate her sometimes – Mum, that is – for not being there for me, and as much as I adore Skye, it’s been so hard. And now she’s smoking bloody weed!’ The tears came again.
Kara put her hand on her friend’s knee. ‘I do hear you. My mum running off when I was thirteen was hard enough but at least I have my dad, so I can’t even imagine what it’s like for you.’
‘Thank God literally for Uncle Jim and Auntie Flo, even though I don’t believe in the big man upstairs.’ Star managed a watery smile. ‘They did their best, but they were busy too. I feel like I’m losing Skye and I don’t think I can bear it.’
‘You will never lose her; she loves you too much.’
‘And what if I do fall for Conor – and what if he leaves me, just like my grandparents and JackandUncle Jim did? Just like everyone fucking does.’ A wracking sob tore through her.
