Sam and Kash, the last of the guests to leave, were saying goodbye to Leah when he returned.
“Want us to stay longer?” he heard Sam offer.
“No, I’m good.” Leah shook her head. “I’ll see you soon.”
They walked to their car, gravel crunching under their shoes. “Night, buddy.” Sam did the whole hand-clasp, shoulder-slap thing. Jackson returned it with a mutter, repeating it with Kash and wishing they would hurry up and go.
Leah hovered on the top step, her face in shadow, her expression masked by the fall of night. “Hazel get back OK?”
“Fine. I’m going to bed.” He coated each word in disinterest and saw her flinch.
“Jackson—” Sam stepped between them. “It wouldn’t hurt to listen.”
He said nothing, just kept on walking. Up the steps, past Hazel’s pot of pansies, past Leah—so close he could smell her shampoo—and into the house. Jackson took the stairs in twos and disappeared into the darkness.
Chapter 44
Leah
“Let me have a word,” Sam offered, but Leah was already shaking her head.
“Leave it for now.” She forced a smile. “I’ll talk to him in the morning. It’ll be fine.” The boys tugged her down the steps and wrapped her in a group hug. Leah let herself cling for a minute, soaking in their friendship. Then she pushed them away and waved them off. “Scoot. It’s past my bedtime and I’m beat.” Leah crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue.
The pair exchanged a look. “Call if you need us.” Kash kissed her cheek.
Silence and shadows settled after they’d driven away, raising the hairs on the back of her neck. The calm she’d grown used to had flown on hushed wings, leaving somber unease in its place.
Leah paused outside Jackson’s room, trying to pluck up the courage to knock, but he’d closed the door completely and no light showed beneath it. She itched to turn the handle and walk in, climb into his bed, and explain that she hadn’t asked for any of this and had no interest in revisiting any kind of relationship with Matt. The thought of it made her skin crawl. Five years she’d spent with him, at the housing center and then in their shared apartment,and yet Leah had never felt a tenth of the closeness she’d built with Jackson in a few short months.
Memories punched her in the throat. Times when she’d begged to be allowed to stay in foster homes or remain with families who’d been kind. It had never once worked; she’d been forever on the outside. Never someone who was chosen for the long haul. Moved on by circumstances beyond her control. Always abandoned.
Eventually, Leah dragged her feet along the landing to her own room and spent the night staring at the ceiling, a hole in her chest where the warmth had leaked out. She didn’t sleep well. The sheets were too heavy, her thoughts too busy. The corners, shadows, and scent of her bedroom so much less restful than usual and she craved Jackson’s breath in the dark.
The moment she woke from restless dozing, a lead weight resettled in her stomach. Wandering downstairs, she was nonplussed to find Jackson’s laptop on the dining table and his car still in the drive. She’d expected him to have gone.
A thorough search revealed he wasn’t in the house. Venturing outside, she followed some clattering and banging to the outbuilding next to the log store.
Leah could tell he’d been out there for some time already. Various broken tools, outdoor furniture, wire, and rubble were heaped on the ground. Jackson appeared in the rickety doorway, an ancient bicycle frame gripped in one hand. He shot Leah a shuttered glance and slung the rusting metal onto the growing trash pile. She held out the coffee she’d made him, every word in her brain turning to slush when she needed them most.
“Thanks.” Part hum, part grunt. In no way was Jackson using proper words either, so maybe it wasn’t just her.
Time to try harder. “Jax—”
“Getting all this shit stripped out and thrown away. I’ll have it picked up this week.” His chin-lift indicated the trash as he tooka quick gulp of coffee. “Same with the house. Anything that isn’t needed can go.”
Leah couldn’t hide her wince. “Jax—”
“I’m listing Amity Court.” Jackson studied her from his great height; there was nothing to read on his face. “I need to get it off my hands now.”
It wasn’t a surprise. They’d discussed how badly he needed to sell. Leah pushed down the swoop of panic, swallowed against the helplessness. “OK. Let me know if there’s anything I can do.”
“You can start looking for somewhere else to live.” His cold blue eyes were merciless. The arctic blast could have stripped her bones.
“Jackson, I—”
“You need to move on. I’ve enjoyed the distraction these last few weeks but I have to get my head back in the game.”
“That’s not all it was. You know it wasn’t!” The dismissal of what they’d shared cut like the devil’s rope. “You’re being an ass because of Matt.”
