“You’re quiet tonight. Something on your mind?”
I could lie and say I’m fine, but whatever force is drawing us together compels me to tell the truth, so I do. “It’s my birthday.”
“What? Why didn’t you say anything? And why the hell are you spending it with me?”
I glance around at my paltry apartment with my thrifted, mismatched furniture and the sad-looking cupcake waiting for me in the box on the counter.
My voice cracks. “I don’t have anyone.”
He’s quiet for a moment, and I brace myself for the inevitable rejection.
“You have me.” His voice is soft, almost tender. “For as long as you need me.”
My heart aches with longing.
Selfishly, I hope he means forever—that someday there won’t be this barrier between us. I know that’s ridiculous. Still, it doesn’t stop me from dreaming.
Emotions clog my throat, and a meager “thank you” is all the response I can muster.
Two weeks ago, Oak Ridge was a point on a map that I randomly landed on. I’m still settling in, and that means I haven’t had time to get to know anyone. I’ve been on my ownfor as long as I can remember. Whatever connections I’ve made along the way have always been temporary. This mysterious cowboy has been the only constant in my life for the last year, and our connection is tenuous at best.
“If you could have anything for your birthday, what would it be?”
“I always wanted a cat.” A ragged breath shudders out of me. “My parents… they didn’t allow pets.” My heart beats erratically as my past shoves its way to the forefront. I try to tamp down on the unwanted emotions, but a quiet whimper slips free.
“They hurt you.”
It’s not a question, but I answer anyway. “Yes.”
“God, Kat. I’m so fucking sorry.”
I pull the blanket tighter around me and press the phone against my chest. It’s not the comfort of his arms, but it’s the closest thing I have. “I don’t want to talk about them.”
“Ok. Whatdoyou want to talk about?”
“What about you? When’s your birthday?”
“January first.”
“A new year’s baby? It must feel like the entire world is celebrating your birthday. No wonder you’re so cocky.”
He lets out a half-hearted chuckle, but there’s something else beneath the surface. “Yeah, but lately, there’s only one person I really want to spend it with.”
My stomach flutters, but it’s quickly replaced by an overwhelming wave of sadness. I want him here with me; I want him to fill this aching loneliness that only wanes with his presence.
I shake myself out of the depressing thoughts. “Smooth line, Cowboy.”
“I do my best.” I can almost hear the smile in his voice.
God, how I wish I could see that smile.
There’s movement on the other end of the line, and heclears his throat. “What’s stopping you from getting a cat now?”
“Nothing, I guess. I just hadn’t really thought about it.”
I’ve never been settled anywhere long enough to even consider getting a pet—always just one misstep away from being back on the streets. This is the most settled I’ve ever been. Maybe I should do it. Maybe then I wouldn’t be so lonely.
“I should probably get to bed. I have to be at work in the morning.”
