“Good, I’m glad she’s here. How much time do you think Addison is going to need before she’ll talk to me again?” My chest ached thinking of how hard these past two weeks had been, and I wasn’t sure I could take much longer without her. Without talking to her, without touching her, without just being in her presence. This hurt like hell. All the Margot bullshit was child’s play compared to this.
Archer blew out a breath, which did nothing to ease my anxiety. “I don’t know, brother.”
All I could do was nod. I was such a fucking idiot. All of this could have been prevented if I had just told her the truth about Noah from the beginning—all of the truth, not just pieces. I should have had enough trust in our relationship, in her, to know that the truth would not make her think differently of me. Fuck, what a mess I’d made. As much as I wanted to smash my fist through Noah’s face, this was my fault. Not his.
Archer pushed out of the chair. “Harp said she was going to stay the night with Addison. Let’s go grab a beer, and then tomorrow let’s go find Noah.”
The mention of Noah made my eyes snap up to his. “Noah is still here?”
Archer chuckled, a menacing look in his eye. “Nah, man, we’re taking a little field trip back to Boston. Harper knows where his apartment is.”
I pushed to my feet and cracked a smile for the first time in weeks. “Let’s fucking go.”
Chapter 23
Addison
“Boo,thatguysucks!”Harper yelled at the TV in my room as she lay beside me in my bed watchingThe Great British Baking Show. “I can’t believe he got Star Baker this week. What a crock of shit,” she complained around a mouthful of chips that she’d just dipped into the bowl of queso sitting between us. Yes, we were eating chips and queso in my bed, watching my favorite show.
I didn’t tell Harper right away what all happened with Dean. I actually kept it to myself for almost two weeks, aside from telling my sister. I needed time to process and digest everything that had transpired over a short period of time. She could tell that something was off with me, shocker, and once I finally came clean, she showed up the next day unannounced on my doorstep with chips, queso, and tequila in hand. Also, it didn’t hurt that she was dating the other billionaire Adler brother, who owns a plane, making a trip from Boston to Texas at a moment’s notice possible.
When I didn’t respond, Harper looked at me and reached over to squeeze my hand. “Addi, he isn’t Noah. This isn’t the same thing. Yes, you should punish him for not telling youabout Noah being his cousin, and yes, you probably should be angry that he faked being Noah’s friend on the phone. But I don’t buy all the bullshit with Margot and moving back to California. Not for a minute. That man is totally obsessed with you. You can’t fake the way he looks at you.”
I blew out a heavy sigh. “I know you’re probably right, but he still lied. Withholding the truth is lying by omission. He knows my past. He knows how important honesty is to me.” I grabbed a chip from the bag and dipped it into the queso. Eating my feelings always made me feel better. At least momentarily. Queso never lied to me.
“Agreed. You’re right, he did lie. But do you think you can forgive him? He explained why he did it and that he didn’t even know what Noah was up to until after the fact. And yes, though still bad, I honestly can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same thing if I were in his shoes. He may not have told you yet, but Dean loves you, Addi. He freaking bought those schooling horses for you so that you would have the very best to start your lesson program with. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.” She popped another chip into her mouth, leaving me speechless. I tilted my head, completely confused by the information that she’d just divulged. I bought my lesson horses. Why would she say that Dean did?
“Uh, Harp. Back up. What do you mean Dean bought my lesson horses? I paid the man myself for them when I went and saw them.”
Harper froze with a chip midway to her mouth, and a panicked look crossed her face.
I narrowed my eyes. “Harper, what do you know?” My tone was serious.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Fuck. Okay. I thought you knew.”
“By my reaction, you can clearly see I have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about. So, spill it. Now.”
“Archer told me a while back that when Dean found those horses, he made a deal with the owner. Evidently, the guy had them priced insanely high, especially for what you were looking for and what you could afford, and wouldn’t budge. Dean bought them and then told him the price to sell them to you because he knew there was no way that you would allow him to buy them for you or accept them as a gift.” She blew out a long, slow breath. “So, not a big deal. It’s actually super romantic if you think about it.”
I sat there quietly for a moment, thinking through what she just told me, and the only thing that kept flashing through my mind was the wordlie. He fucking lied again. “Harp, yes, that instance alone might be seen as a sweet or romantic gesture, but coupled with the other events that have occurred, it’s just another lie to me. He lied again by withholding this information from me. How am I supposed to believe all the Margot and California texts that Noah showed me aren’t true? I mean, I saw the texts and his phone number with my own eyes.”
Harper laid her head back against my headboard and slowly turned her head to face me. “I don’t know, Addi. I can’t explain those texts, but sometimes when you love someone, you justhave to have faith in them. And I know that you love him. I also know that all of this lying-by-omission stuff is beginning to add up to be a lot for you, and that’s fair too. There was never malicious intent behind any of this from Dean, and you deserve all the time you need to work through it. But can I ask you a question?”
I nodded, encouraging her to continue.
“Dean has shown up for you day after day in ways that Noah never did. He explained everything to you. Do you not trust him, or do you not trust yourself?” Harper lifted a brow. It was as if she’d peeled back my thoughts and dropped my worst fear in front of me, laid bare and utterly exposed.
“I don’t know,” I lied.
“Addi, I know it’s scary and a vulnerable position to be in to fully trust another person, especially after everything with Noah. You question yourownjudgment when someone that you loved and trusted betrays you. You question yourself at every turn and what signs you might have missed. You’ve told me before that you don’t trust yourself not to lose yourself in another man, and I’m sure you don’t trust yourself to choose the right partner either. People make mistakes, and I know that you know deep down that Dean is a different person than Noah. Don’t push away someone wonderful because you’re scared. Losing yourself in Dean is different from losing yourself in Noah. You and Dean share the same passion and dreams. He supports and loves everything that you are.”
I blew out a shaky breath as I allowed Harper’s words to sink in.
“Just do me a favor and remember that this is Dean. He made a mistake, but he isn’t Noah. Give yourself some grace and trust in yourself to make the right decision for you, and you have every right to take the time you need to process all of this.”
I nodded. “Okay, I can do that.” I reached over for her hand. “Thank you for showing up.”
She smiled. “Girl, always.” She leaned forward and patted my leg. “Now let’s watch some more amateur baking and drink some more tequila.”
