“Don’t you say a goddamn word about her,” I say in a low growl, shoving my palm flat against his chest. “Do you understand?”
“Why the fuck are you picking on me? It’s her parents’ genetics you need to have a talk with.”
My jaw locks, nostrils flaring as I fight for control. “I’m picking on you because you’re the one who organised the party,” I say, angling into another grievance, one far easier to articulate.
“I only held it at yours because you can’t—”
Maddox sends him a warning glare hot enough to melt the rest of that sentence clean away.
Turning back to my locker, I flip through the books inside, then pause, unable to recall what classes I have today. Unable to remember a single subject I take.
My lips buzz from being so close to Avon’s skin, my tongue revelling in the saltiness of the tear I licked from her mouth, and I’m furious because I want to kiss her, I want toravageher, and she’s never going to let me do that.
I slam the metal door shut just to spill a tiny pinch of aggression and my mind fills with her hopeful expression as she explained how we could go to the police together. Like she’d stumbled on the perfect plan.
No malice. No ill will. Just wanting to report the incident and move on.
But the police think I set fire to a building and left three people to burn. An act of reckless endangerment.
And how reckless is it not to take two seconds to ask the crying girl in my room if she’s the whore I hired? Just to be absolutely sure.
“Maybe you should sit out the first few lessons,” Maddox suggests, and I realise I’ve been standing, staring at nothing while the minutes tick by. “Come up to the clubhouse with me.”
“Where’s Evie?”
He tilts his head to one side and for a horrifying moment I think he’s going to say she’s not coming near me. That he’s not stupid enough to let his precious fiancée loose in my presence.
Instead, he flicks a glance to Wilder, then rolls his eyes. “She’s hanging out with her friend.”
The explanation makes sense. Just because Dahlia dumped his-royal-deadweight doesn’t break the strong bond she formed with Evie. On any other day, I’d be amused at her holding tight to the friendship just for the annoyance value.
Wilder gives up on the both of us, heading into the common room to find someone who’ll appreciate his company.
“Yeah.” I close my eyes, rubbing my temple where it’s beginning to ache. “The clubhouse sounds good.”
The assembly hall is full of the lower years as we slip into the side corridor then up a narrow staircase to the spare room above, used as a storage space until we requisitioned it and nobody at the school could think of a valid reason for us not to have it. An outcome influenced by the amount of money our parents funnel into the school.
I move straight to the window, opening it to feel the breeze even though it’s freezing out, the day not yet shifting out of single digits.
“Maybe I should ask her about the contract again. She might be more amenable to sign after this morning.” Maddox makes a strange noise in the back of his throat. “What?”
“She didn’t want to sign yesterday. She’s sure as fuck not going to sign now, after what we’ve done to her.”
“Well, what did she sayspecifically?”
“That it happened, and she doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life censoring herself.” His jaw clenches, bright spots of crimson burning his skin. “That you held your hand over her mouth and pinched her nose shut and she thought you were going to kill her and what the actual fuck, Zane? What the fuck were you—”
He launches away from me, hands fisted, storming from the room and slamming the door behind him. I’ve seen his frustration building, but it’s still a slap in the face.
And I could pretend not to understand what’s upset him but of course I do and it’s nothing to do with Avon, a girl he barely knows.
It’s Addie.
He transposed what happened with Avon to his sister. Another girl I should never have gone near, no matter what self-serving excuses I used at the time.
She’s the reason I took the blame for our vigilante actions; a penance I thought would ease my conscience, lead me to a place of self-absolution, and instead twisted me further into isolation.
Maddox’s fury is another dagger in my gut, further blackening my mood, turning my brain to static fuzz. I can’t comprehend how awful it would be to lose his friendship. We’re already drifting apart; him absorbed with Evie and their new life together while I’m chained at home by my monitor.
