‘What sort of perv would that make me? No, I had my rubber duck swimming shorts on.’
Nora was laughing again thanks to the image thisconjured up. ‘I’m sorry but that is the funniest thing.’ A quick look at Bruce and he appeared to be grinning at her.
‘I’m pleased someone is finding it funny. I’m sure I will too, in about thirty or forty years,’ said Jay. ‘I think I’ve got some sort of shit PTSD because I swear I can still smell it. Can you smell poo?’ Jay leaned forward. ‘Be honest.’
Nora sniffed the air. She inched a little closer and sniffed harder. ‘Nope, you smell poo-free.’ He actually smelled really nice.
‘Thank goodness for that. Anyway, how’s things with you?’
‘I got totally ambushed at Dad’s birthday as to why I am still single. But Dad loved his sweater vest. I might make it for him again but a few sizes bigger so that it actually fits him.’
‘Good idea,’ said Jay, nodding sagely. ‘And the ex-boyfriend strategy. How’s that going?’
Nora felt a squiggle of something in her gut. ‘I tracked down Liam and we’ve been messaging.’
‘Liam, is he the one who dumped you, like the only person who has ever dumped you?’ asked Jay.
‘Not the only one. There was Nicholas Badcock.’
Jay snorted a laugh. ‘That’s not a nice nickname.’
‘Badcock is his actual surname. And anyway we were twelve so I can’t comment on his anatomy.’
Jay got himself comfortable. ‘OK. Let’s start with Nicholas. Why did he dump you?’
‘Abby Hobbs offered to share her doughnut with him if he went out with her so he told me I was chucked.’
‘Shallow Master Badcock. Although…’ Jay pouted. ‘What sort of doughnut? Because if it was jam and fresh cream then I’d do the same.’
Nora whacked him with a cushion. ‘It wasn’t fresh cream. It was that awful bright white plastic-tasting stuff.’
Jay tilted his chin. ‘Still, any doughnut is pretty good,’ he said, taking another cushion to the head. ‘And why did Liam end your relationship?’
Nora took a moment. ‘Because I put weedkiller on his sticky willy.’
18
Nora didn’t want to rush things with Liam but she also didn’t like waiting. Since she’d tracked him down he had been occupying a lot of her thoughts. Being dumped by him had been a shock and an unhappy time in her life. She’d often been compelled to end relationships at the merest hint that things weren’t perfect for fear of being dumped herself. Perhaps it was a reaction to frequently being dropped by girls at school. Walking away first was a way to control the outcome, so it was a shock to have it happen to her. But that was a while ago and as long as she could look past Liam ditching her then perhaps there was something there. He was a good person and she was certain that he no longer held a grudge against her for what she did. Well, almost certain.
She had had to explain what happened to a rather concerned Jay, who had instantly crossed his legs at the mention of her killing her ex’s sticky willy. Liam’s sticky willy, otherwise known as a cleavers plant, was growing in a tub in his garden. Nora had always assumed theseplants, so loved by schoolboys for sticking to school jumpers, were weeds. This one was big and bushy and occupying a nice corner. She thought she would kill it off and buy him something prettier to go in its place. Nora didn’t get as far as choosing a replacement because Liam was distraught that the plant he’d grown from one at his beloved great-nana’s house had mysteriously died. When she had owned up to killing it he’d called her a murderer and demanded she leave. Apparently he had fond childhood memories of him and his cousins playing with the sticky weed and hoped one day his children would be able to enjoy the same. Even a couple of days to calm down didn’t change his feelings about the dead plant or Nora, and he’d dumped her.
That was all behind them and now they needed to arrange a much-needed catch-up. Perhaps if she suggested a daytime meet-up they could have a coffee and she could start to assess if there was anything worth pursuing. If it hadn’t been for the sticky willy incident, who knows how their relationship would have gone? From the look of Liam’s profile picture, he was hotter than ever. Looks were definitely not the most important thing but they were a nice bonus. In the photograph he was very corporate-suit but it helped that she already knew the muscular physique underneath. Actually, she quite liked the idea of dishevelling his corporate image. She shook that thought from her mind. She was getting ahead of herself.
It was late evening and she was in bed. It was a hotnight and she’d taken to sleeping in just her pants. She had nobody else to think about and she always put on her dressing gown before she went downstairs so she wasn’t likely to scare Oliver or the neighbours. It started to rain against her window– perhaps that would take some of the heat out of the day. Nora mulled over what to say to Liam and if it would come across as desperate. She didn’t want to scare him off. It was best not to think too much about it so she quickly sent Liam a message.
How about we meet up for coffee and a catch-up sometime soon?
She pressed send before she could overthink it.
An almost instant reply popped up.
Sure. Remember this?
And there was a link. A click took her to his Instagram and a picture of the bar they used to go to. She checked out his Instagram grid. He wasn’t using his real name– he was FootyfanLiam. No wonder she’d not been able to find him. She liked the post and began casually scrolling through his feed. A message arrived from him but this time it was via Instagram. It was basically just a row of beer emojis. Was he suggesting they go out for a drink? She replied:
I’m more of a cocktail person these days
And then she waited. And she waited. If he was out he’d likely be drinking so perhaps she’d not get a reply tonight. Nora yawned. She must have started to nod off because she felt her phone slipping from her grasp. She gripped the phone and blinked a few times as she came to. She looked at the screen. It was moving. What was she watching? It was Liam in a dark room. His mouth was moving but there was no sound. And he was pointing frantically at the screen. That was when she noticed the tiny square in the top corner that was her. When she’d gripped the phone she must have inadvertently started a video call. There she was, video-calling with Liam– topless.
