Emily checked Lottie’s expression. She seemed like an honest and open person; this wasn’t a trap. Emily relaxed her shoulders. ‘You’re right; they’re a nightmare. How come you’re still sane?’
‘I’m not. I just look good next to them. It’s all relative. In this case, literally.’ They laughed together and any final barriers between them were down. Lottie sidled over and pushed the kitchen door shut. They needed a little bit of privacy for a good gossip.
‘I like Bernard. You looked surprised when he announced his engagement,’ said Emily.
‘I think we all were. But I’m happy for him. Dayea is lovely.’
‘I’m sure she is; but thereisa bit of an age gap. You don’t think maybe …’
‘She’s after his money? It’s okay, I think we all thoughtit. But I’m sure she’s genuine – and if she’s going to make him happy, I can’t see the harm really.’
‘And your mum’s going out with a porn star.’ She laughed, saw Lottie’s expression change, and instantly felt bad. ‘I’m sorry. That’s probably not quite as funny from your perspective.’
‘No, it is funny. It’s also typical of my mother. She has a really bad track record with men. And, despite everything, I do worry about her. I think she really likes Scott, so the inevitable breakup is going to hurt. This time she won’t have Nana to pick up the pieces.’
‘And I couldn’t believe it when that woman turned up. It was like Christmas Day in Albert Square,’ said Emily.
‘There’s less drama onEastEnders– and at least they have some light relief. But I guess we have alcohol, and that helps a bit. Not that I’m advocating it for everyone.’ Lottie’s eyes momentarily scanned Emily’s midriff. Emily tensed up as Lottie spoke again. ‘I saw you and Zach go off together earlier.’ The unspoken question hung in the air.
This was the conversation Emily could not avoid. Part of her didn’t even want to any more. She needed a friend right now, and Lottie seemed to fit the bill, even if she was her boyfriend’s sister.
‘I didn’t do the test,’ said Emily. Lottie looked surprised. ‘I decided it was something Zach should be there for and I told him we needed to talk.’ Lottie began nodding and Emily relaxed. ‘But when I went upstairs, he stayed down here to watch the live episode ofEastEndersplaying out on your doorstep.’ She sighed at her foiled plan.
‘Typical bloody Zach. He’s rubbish at picking up vibes. You kind of need to spell it out to him.’
‘It’s really difficult with the family around us all the time.’
‘Yes, you’d think in a house this size you’d be able to escape, but you can’t. Summer is better here. The gardens are vast, so there are lots more opportunities to be on your own.’
‘Outside loo?’ asked Emily, only half joking. Lottie shook her head. ‘Then even the gardens aren’t ideal for doing a test,’ pointed out Emily.
‘True,’ said Lottie, with a smile. ‘You know you’re just putting it off now. Right?’
Emily liked that Lottie told it how it was. ‘Yes, I know. But I’m terrified of the result.’
Lottie’s eyes widened. ‘Don’t you want kids?’
‘I do want children,’ said Emily, putting down the tea towel and leaning against the sink. ‘But I want to make the decisions in my life about what I do and when, and right now this is not part of the plan.’ The thought of slipping off the career ladder worried her, as well as her sister’s smug face.
‘Sometimes that’s not possible. Nana used to say that everything happens for a reason and I truly believe that.’
Emily rubbed her tummy. She wished her period would kick in and then everything could go back to normal. She couldn’t believe she’d got herself into this pickle. She was usually so careful. ‘I really don’t know how this happened.’ Lottie tilted her head. It made Emily smile. ‘Well, apart from the obvious.’
‘But you don’t know for sure ithashappened until you do the test.’
This was the simple fact – Lottie was right. ‘It’s just a late period right now, and that’s no big deal. But once I do the test then it could be a pregnancy and I really will have to face it. And I’ll have to face Zach.’
‘It is his fault too, you know.’ Lottie’s expression waswarm. ‘You shouldn’t have to go through this on your own. Nobody should.’ She seemed to pause for a moment. ‘And I know he’s my brother, but he’s also a decent bloke. If you ignore the nightmare family, of course.’
‘Maybe I was wrong about doing the test together. If I do it and it’s negative then there’s no drama.’
‘And if it’s positive?’
Emily took a deep breath. ‘Then perhaps it would be best if I got my head around it first.’
Lottie was nodding her agreement. ‘I think that sounds like a good plan.’ She checked her list on the table, looked at the clock and then set a kitchen timer. ‘No time like the present,’ she said. ‘Do you want me to come with you?’
For a second Emily almost dismissed the offer out of hand, but there was something so kind and genuine about Lottie that made her feel she needed her around. ‘Maybe just outside the door,’ she suggested.
