Regan gave him an amused look. ‘Other than making him wear a onesie, which would be highly entertaining, I can’t think how you might achieve the last one.’
‘I’m not trying to be awkward, I just don’t want the place covered in dog hair because then it will smell of, well, dog,’ said Charlie.
‘I understand. He’s pretty good. Aren’t you, boy?’ Elvis trotted over to stand in front of Charlie. He gave himself a good scratch with his back leg and a flurry of fur puffed into the air. And with a dramatic full-body shake, he distributed another pile onto the living room carpet.
‘Okay, maybe we’ll have to live with the fur thing,’ said Charlie good-naturedly, opening a cupboard and pulling out a vacuum cleaner.
‘Sorry.’
Elvis eyed the vacuum suspiciously until Charlie turned it on; then he went bonkers, barking at full volume and trying to bite it every time Charlie pushed it forwards. Once the pile of hair was sucked up, Charlie switched it off, but there was a delay where Elvis continued to bark at it. Charlie went to put the vacuum away, which was handy – because that was the moment Elvis chose to lift his back legs up in the air in front of him and drag his bum along the carpet. Thankfully Regan was able to grab his collar and usher him into the hallway, but she couldn’t hide her giggles – it was without doubt one of the funniest things she’d ever seen.
‘What’s so funny?’ asked Charlie, shutting the cupboard door, still oblivious to Elvis’s bum wiping antics.
‘Nothing.’ Regan tried to look innocent.
‘And I wanted to check you were still okay with our agreement.’ He broke eye contact.
Regan waved her hands at him. ‘Look, I think I’veshown I can keep my hands off you. Your virtue is safe with me, Charlie McGee.’
‘Sorry. I just thought it was better to be clear than to have any …’
‘Awkward advances? No, you’re safe. I’ve decided I’m into hairy males now.’ She tipped her head at Elvis. ‘So unless you’re planning on turning into Hagrid, you’ll be fine.’
‘I’ll make sure I shave every day.’
‘No need to go that far.’ She liked his stubbly look.
He pushed his hands into his pockets and hunched up his shoulders. ‘Do you want to see your room?’
Elvis was still meticulously inspecting the hallway so she figured he’d be occupied for a few minutes at least. ‘I’d love to.’
Upstairs was compact and matched downstairs with its white walls and grey carpets. ‘Here you go,’ said Charlie, opening a door to reveal a nice-sized bedroom with a double bed, wardrobe and tub chair. ‘Beanstalk has cleared a shelf in the wardrobe and asked that you don’t wear his underwear.’
‘Great.’ She flopped onto the bed and lay down. ‘Ahhhh.’ The involuntary sound came out with more of a sexual tinge than she’d intended; but it was so comfy.
‘Right. Well … my room is next door. And there’s a lock—’
‘Bloody hell, Charlie. You make me sound like some sort of sexual predator. I promise I won’t jump you.’ She snuggled into the thick duvet; it was bliss. ‘Anyway, you’ll never entice me off this bed.’
‘I was going to say there’s a lock been put on the bathroom door, and I’ve even scraped the mould off the tiles especially for you.’
She opened one eye. ‘Bloody hell, I am honoured. Now who’s sounding seductive?’
He fixed her with a long-suffering look. ‘Any questions?’
‘Yes.’ She propped herself up on her elbows and she could have sworn he inched behind the door for safety. ‘What’s for tea?’
‘Me and Beanstalk usually have a takeaway on a Sunday night.’
‘Brilliant.’
As it turned out it wasn’t entirely brilliant, because they left the pizza on the side while they fought over who was paying and then over who was tipping, which gave Elvis enough time to figure out there was food in the odd, flat-shaped box. He hadn’t worked out how to open it, so he had simply eaten half the pizza box as well.
‘Elvis!’ shouted Regan, dragging him out to the small back garden and giving Charlie her best apologetic face on the way.
Charlie was laughing. ‘He’s a four-legged dustbin. I’ll order another pizza. Same again?’ he asked.
‘Please.’ Elvis was busy smacking his lips whilst trying to seize the other half of the pizza box. ‘Apparently it was delicious.’
