Yes!“You don’t have to sound so angry about it.”
“You don’t know.”He has to tap the brakes once we hit traffic, and for once, I’m glad we hit the road around rush hour.It means more time for this.“I’ve been trying.For once, I’m trying to do the right thing.Why do you have to make it impossible?”he asks.
Oh.I didn’t think about it that way.Alessandro Vitelli is trying to turn over a new leaf.I figured he was covering his ass and mine.There’s a bigger picture he’s worrying about, and here I am, horny and awkward.In a rush, I blurt out, “I’m sorry.I was being selfish.Pretend this never happened.”
All he does is laugh.“Right.That’s possible.I’ll forget it.I’ve been trying to forget since Friday, and all I have to show for that is an empty bottle of lotion on the nightstand.”
Dammit.To.Hell.He was jerking off thinking about me.
I can barely take a breath, and my pussy quivers as this sinks in.“I’m… sorry?”
“You should be.I should punish you for torturing me.”All of a sudden, he smacks his palm against the wheel.“Fucking hell.I shouldn’t have said that.Forget I said it.”
Here I was, thinking I’m the awkward one.It only hits me now that this could be his first time wrestling with wanting somebody and not knowing what to do about it.Until now, he probably snapped his fingers, and women came running—no effort, no questions, no time for second thoughts.
Compared to those women, I’m a child.I really thought unbuttoning my sweater and teasing him a little would lead to something, as if I could remind him how it was in the garage and how it could be again.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” I whisper, staring down at my lap.Might as well put it out there, not like he doesn’t already know by now.
“I can tell you, if you’re interested,” he offers, his voice low, intimate, and much too sexy.“You’re making it impossible for me to focus on the road because all I can think about is how much I want to pull over and climb back there with you.I know it’s wrong.I know I shouldn’t.But it’s all I can think about, and it’s allyourfault.”
It’s official.This is going to kill me.I’m going to forget how to breathe, and that will be it.I’ll die surrounded by cars in the middle of rush-hour traffic with a wet spot in my panties.“What are we going to do about this?”I ask.
“I don’t know.”He sighs.“You know my ass is history if anyone ever found out, especially Luca.”
Luca.Emilia.I am the most despicable traitor.“Right.Mine, too.It would be much worse than getting pulled out of school, by the way,” I add, remembering what he said on Friday.School would be the tip of the iceberg.
And Papa might not be able to handle it.His heart.He doesn’t need the extra stress.
“Then we’re agreed.”He sounds miserable, which doesn’t help a damn bit, but I guess it would be worse if he sounded relieved.“Nothing ever happened, and nothing will again.For both our sakes.Right?”
The ache in my chest will go away eventually.I need to believe that.It’s only a disappointment.I don’t have actual feelings for this guy beyond confusion and conflict.I’ve had enough experience with disappointment to know it doesn’t last forever.I’ll get over it.
Though it doesn’t feel that way when we reach the Village, where Alessandro soon pulls up in front of the courtyard where the girls will be waiting.“Here you are,” he announces, wasting no time getting out when I want him to go slow.I don’t want this to end.There’s this certainty in my soul that everything is going to be different when he picks me up.We’ll have to go back to the way we were before.He’ll call me little sister and treat me like I’m nothing but a brat.
I guess that’s why tears well up in my eyes as he opens my door.I don’t want him to see.That’s the last thing I need.To look like a lovesick child, longing for what she can’t have.
“Wait inside until I confirm I’m out here,” he reminds me as I hustle out of the car with my head down.Instead of letting me go, he holds me back with a hand on my shoulder.“Hey.Look at me.”
Not this.Anything but this.
The nail in the coffin I’m burying my hopes in, and my dignity, for that matter.When he doesn’t let me go, I look up in time for him to watch a tear spill over my lashes.
His shoulders rise and fall before he gently runs his thumb over my cheek to catch the droplet.I can’t help but shiver at his touch.We’re standing on a busy street choked with cars and pedestrians, yet they might as well not be there.We might as well be alone.
“Is it true you can do your schoolwork virtually?”he asks out of nowhere.
“Huh?Yeah, I guess so,” I sniffle.
“Then it wouldn’t hurt you to miss a class this morning?”
Hope flickers in my chest, warming it, making it swell.“I don’t think it would.”
“Okay, then.”He opens the door wider.“Get back in.”
“Where are we going?”I ask, even if I already have a good idea.I’m starting to tremble with anticipation, my heart thumping against my ribs.
He doesn’t mince words.“We’re going to my apartment to do something I hope we don’t regret.So get in before I change my mind.”
