His fingers squeeze tighter on mine. “I never once considered letting go.”
I walk as quickly but efficiently as I can in the stilettos across the uneven stone pavement to the table my purse is sitting on. The second my fingers close on the strap I hear her stop behind me.
“Everyone is staring at you,” she says in a stage whisper.
I turn around and find Jason trailing slowly behind Kate with an apologetic look on his face.
“I needed my purse.” I hold up the object in question. Her eyes follow it then flick back up to me.
“Well hurry up. This is mortifying,” Kate says. Jason rests a hand on her hip. She bats it off.
“How is this mortifying foryou? I’m the one covered in wine that’s not even my own.”
She glares at the dress as if she hand-stitched herself. “Yeah, way to take care of the dress I sent to you by the way.”
“Stop acting like a martyr. I paid for this myself.”
Her eyes flash in anger. “Can you just go? I think you’ve done enough.”
“Fine,” I snap, already starting to walk away. Reid is still by my side. He never left.
“Come with a better attitude tomorrow,” Kate calls after me, so unlike her usual self. Whoever this bridezilla is isn’t my sister, and I cannot wait for this wedding to be over.
“Youget a better attitude,” I yell back over my shoulder.
The retort is petulant, but at this point I don’t care. Because despite leaving after a blowout fight with the bride in a stained dress and the best man’s suit coat—a moment that should truly be the most embarrassing of my life—I’m also leaving with Reid’s hand in mine.
And I know that alone has me winning the argument.
Chapter 27
Ican’t bring myself to go back to the villa right away. The night ended in disaster, but I didn’t want to waste the sunset. Or the dress, honestly, even if it is covered in a spectacular red stain. Reid holds my hand as we walk up and down the steep and narrow streets of Positano. I’m still wearing Reid’s coat, which thankfully is warding off against the chill of the air as the sun dips below the horizon. We pass couples on date nights and other tourists stopping to the side to take photos of the swirling sky as it darkens and the stars twinkle.
“Thank you,” I finally say to him. He turns to look at me with a raised eyebrow, silently questioning what I’m thankful for, but waiting for me to continue. “For being by my side back there.”
“Like I said, your battle is mine. I just . . .” He stops, runs a hand through his dark hair to push the strands out of his face.
“You don’t know why I let them walk all over me.”
“I really don’t,” he says.
“I’ve always felt left out,” I admit. “Charlie is the only boy. He’s the first born. He has his own things going on. We got along, but we were never really close. And I was so excited to have sisters, but Kate and Lydia aretwins, and you know how twins are. They have that super specific bond. So I’ve always just been . . . there. So I always bent over backwards to make sure they liked me or included me or just wanted to talk to me. Because they had each other, but I always felt like I had no one. My dad has always been closest with Charlie. My mom always doted on the twins. And I was just there.”
“You’re not just there, Jane.”
“No, I know. At least I do now, but growing up it was hard to get anyone’s attention. I always felt like an afterthought. My parents got hand-me-down clothes from the neighbor for me, but went out and bought the twins matching sets. They forgot me at volleyball practice multiple times because they were busy chatting with other parents at the girls’ ballet practices. When I got my license, they essentially chucked me the car keys and told me to go wherever. Which I’m sure seems like a dream for a teenager to be able to slip in and out unnoticed and have keys to get somewhere, but I just wanted them to acknowledge me. To miss me if I stayed out past curfew. They just never did. And I got used to that. And I took whatever little crumbs of attention I could get from my sisters. And even from Charlie. That’s why I suffer through these weekly brunches the twins wanted to start once we were all back in the same city again after college. It’s why I spent stupid amounts of money on the clothes she wanted me to wear and the things she needed for the wedding. It’s why I never tell Kate no. Because I just want her to . . .”
“See you.”
I nod in response, confident that I’ll burst into tears if I speak. Reid’s fingers squeeze tightly on my own and I feel a sense of peace at finally admitting the words. Mostly because I admitted them to someone who does actually see me. He sees me and hestays.
“I know it sounds stupid, but?—”
“It’s not stupid to want your family to love you, Jane. I just want you to speak up for yourself. Because all you’ve done your entire life is say yes to her and for what? It’s time to start saying yes to yourself, and the people who matter will stay.”
“Will you? Stay, I mean.”
He stops in his tracks so fast that I don’t even realize it until his hand is yanking mine back. I spin to look at him and he tugs my hand again, this time so that I’ll close the distance between us. An earnestness is across his face that has me close to tears again, simply because I feel everything right now for him—relaxed and happy and loved and safe. But I also feel terrified that someday he’ll leave and take all of those feelings with him.
