“I speak as an adult who had no one to guide me growing up. There were times when mistakes taught me more than any lecture could have. Sometimes protecting your loved one means letting them make mistakes.”
Matteo smoothed an errant lock of hair from her forehead, the golden strands soft to his touch. Her blue eyes, somewhat darkened with her troubles, watched him carefully.
“Perhaps Chastity needs the chance to choose for herself, even if it does indeed end in pain.”
Matteo watched Helena as she considered his words. He could see the pain, the uncertainty, even the regret in her every expression.
How deeply she cares. A sister, a daughter, indeed a mother to her sisters, all roles that she has taken upon herself. Alone.
It was all too much for one person to carry alone.
His hands longed to reach for her, to take her in his arms and offer her himself as a helpmate. He longed to say more, so much more. The words were already upon his lips, but her look of dejection told him that now was not the time.
Instead, he gently cupped her face with his hands and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Helena looked at him as if searching for answers in his eyes.
Matteo’s heart knew the truth. What began as a pretense now proved to be the most honest thing in his life. His whole life had taught him to guard his heart, never give more than he could receive, yet now here he was, wanting to give Helena all that was in him to give.
“Helena.”
Faith called to her from the settee.
“Yes, dear?” Helena stopped her pacing and turned to her sister.
“Your pacing is very distracting.”
“Oh. My apologies, Faith.”
Sighing, Helena sat down next to her sister.
They had occupied the sitting room since finishing breakfast on the next day of her meeting with Matteo. Since then, Helena had been pacing the length of the room.
“You know,” Faith continued. “Chastity is not angry at you.”
Helena, who had been wracked with worry and guilt, looked abruptly at her sister.
“I am afraid that I pushed her too hard, that I have been insensitive to her feelings.” Helena held her palms up in helplessness. “And I hardly know how to make it right.”
Faith took both her older sister’s hands in hers.
“Listen to me Helena. Chastity is not angry; she is ashamed that she was almost caught in a scandal. She needs time and perhaps your belief that she is capable of deciding for herself,” Faith said.
Helena nodded, unable to reply. There were times when she forgot that Faith was no longer a child herself, that she was barely a year younger than Chastity. She rarely spoke about feelings, but when she did, one would be wise to listen.
So wise for one so young.
“Helena,” Faith said again, “I have known you all my life, I know when you are distressed by your sisters, by our parents, or by other things.”
Helena looked away from Faith’s knowing eyes.
“Tell me what else is bothering you. For there is something else.”
Helena hesitated, concerned about Faith’s reaction once she told her about her arrangement with Matteo. It was hard to explain all the dishonesty, all the pretense. She closed her eyes. Then, before she could decide otherwise, she spoke.
“My engagement with Matteo is not real.”
When Faith only nodded, Helena repeated her words.
“Oh, I heard you the first time,” Faith said calmly. “I did wonder about it; it was so unlike you to agree to an engagement that hastily.”
