Three days had passed since Matteo spoke to her father. Three days since Matteo and Chastity had been engaged. Three days since Helena had buried herself in her duties.
“Sally, please go ahead and tell Mr. Keble to call for the carriage,” Helena told her lady’s maid. “I shall be down shortly and wish to leave at once,”
“Yes, m’lady.” Sally curtsied and did as her mistress bid.
Helena collected the last of her correspondence and put her desk in order. She gave herself the whole morning to accomplish the task of completing the last of Chastity’s wedding attire. In the afternoon, she would start with the wedding trousseau. She had a few more days to complete that, but Helena thought that the sooner the task was completed, the better it would be for her in particular.
Helena could not quite decide whether this whole business was funny or cruel, perhaps both, for many times had she wanted to both laugh and cry at the same time.
“This is absurd!” she had whispered fiercely to herself multiple times. Had she not always planned for this? For Chastity to be married to a respectable gentleman of the ton?
She held back a sob.
Matteo.
Would the pain never go away? Would it never dull down? Helena was heartily tired of holding back tears. She was heartily tired of pretending that she was alright. She was tired of forcing herself every morning to rise and perform her duties to her family, when all she really wanted to do was to curl up again in her bed and forget that the world existed outside the four walls of her chambers, like she had three days ago.
She was already halfway down the stairs when she heard the knock on the front door. She saw as Mr. Keble opened it and at once revealed Matteo. For a moment, Helena considered running back up the stairs. But no sooner had the thought crossed her mind than Matteo entered the house, his eyes somehow seeing her at once.
Their eyes locked. It was the first time she saw him again, and it felt to Helena as if it had been years instead of days. She missed him, she missed his company, the way he made her laugh, the way he listened. She missed holding his hand. She missedhim.
Matteo bowed his head and moved past the stairs, following the butler to the earl’s study. Helena felt herself breathe again. Would she ever recover from this—this illness? This aching of the heart? She was mightily tired of it.
“Oh, for pity’s sake, Helena!” she whispered to herself. “Do your duty.”
Steadying her nerves, Helena continued the flight down the stairs. She needed to finish the tasks for her sister’s wedding to Matteo.
“I think the first bonnet goes better with the gown.”
Grace walked around her older sister, Chastity, appraising her attire. She, Faith, and Helena stood around Chastity’s bedchambers as they watched Sally put her wedding attire together.
“What do you think, Chastity?” Grace asked her sister. “Which one do you prefer?”
Chastity, who stood in front of the full-length mirror donning her wedding gown and the second of the bonnets she tried, shrugged her shoulders.
“They both look fine to me,” she said simply.
“What about the gloves, m’lady?” Sally asked.
She went to Chastity bringing forward two pairs of gloves for her to choose from.
Another shrug of the shoulders.
“You choose for me, Sally. I shall wear whichever you recommend.”
The lady’s maid looked at Helena for help.
“Perhaps the satin ones? The shade works better with the gown, I think.” Helena said, forcing a smile.
She stood up and went to Sally. Choosing the satin gloves, she put them on Chastity.
“There, what do you think?” Helena asked, speaking more cheerfully than she really felt.
Indeed, Helena could perceive that everyone in the room seemed to be putting much effort in projecting a cheerfulness that they did not really feel. Everyone except Chastity.
The past three days had still not allowed them to become accustomed to Chastity’s recently acquiescent ways.
When she had told Helena that she would do anything she said, Helena had not quite expected that her sister meant it all so literally. Indeed, anything that required a decision, Chastity deferred to Helena’s choice. Helena was starting to become unnerved by her actions. How long was her sister to become this meek, opinionless young woman? She honestly did not know if this was better than when she refused to speak to any of them at all.
