My stomach is in perpetual knots.
Inside the hotel room, the lights are soft. Niamh kicks off her boots and flops onto the bed. I watch her slide down her leggings and undo the top button of her blouse, lips parted, pupils dilated. She’s still buzzing from the high of a good show, and a couple of gin and tonics.
“You’ve been weird all night.” She shrugs off her top and undoes her bra. Plumps up her tits and rolls her brown nipples into points.
“I’m tired.” I avert my eyes and shrug off my jacket.
“Linus.” She narrows her eyes. “Don’t lie to me.”
I undress down to my boxer briefs and sit beside her. She leans over and kisses me. Her tongue traces the inside of my mouth like she’s done a million times before. My hands find her waist by muscle memory. Her body is familiar, comforting. I’ve loved her for years.
She grabs between my legs. I’m flaccid.
“Seriously?” She pulls back. “We haven’t fucked since you got back from holiday two months ago. You talked a big game at the merch table this afternoon.”
“I know. I said I was tired.”
“Is it me?”
“No. Fuck, Niamh. It’s not.”
Determined to prove something, I cup her breasts. She arches into my touch. Gasps when I pinch her nipple. I trail kisses down her stomach, tongue flicking over her navel as I nudge her thighs apart.
She’s already wet.
Pulling Niamh’s panties to the side, I go down on her. She writhes and clutches at my hair. I know every inch of her. Exactly how she likes her pussy licked. This is the least I can do. Her legs shake whenshe comes.
When she tugs me up and slides her hand into my boxers, she discovers I’m still only half-hard. Not even.
“Jesus, Linus.”
“I’m sorry.”
Her hand works me, lips brushing my ear. “Do you want me?”
“Aye.”
“Prove it.”
I nod, mouth dry. She pushes me onto my back, swings a leg over, and kisses down my chest. Her mouth is warm and soft. She yanks down my briefs to my knees, takes me down her throat. No hesitation. No gag.
It does the trick. My cock springs to life.
When she climbs on top of me and sinks down, my erection lasts maybe a minute before I start to go soft inside her. Her brow furrows.
“What the fuck,” she snaps, climbing off. “You’re not even trying.”
“Iamtrying.”
“Then what is it?”
I sit up, heart thudding. I’ve been carrying this for weeks. Swallowed it like glass and let it shred my insides. Now my secret is pushing its way out, jagged and burning.
“There was someone else.”
Silence. Niamh’s shoulders go still. She scrambles off me. “Youcheatedon me?”
I nod.
