With a sigh, Ben descended the rickety ladder and put the lawn mower in the shed before walking to the deck. It was so much easier to do as his father asked than get into a war of words. He readied the barbeque, taking off the cover and checking it didn’t need cleaning, before heading back through the sliding doors to the kitchen where his mum was fussing over a salad. He kissed her cheek and snagged a slice of cucumber from the chopping board. “That looks good, Mum. What can I do to help?” He popped the cucumber in his mouth.
“There’s not a lot left to do. There are some steaks marinating on a couple of plates in the fridge, so we’re nearly ready to start cooking. I’m just finishing up the salad, and I’ve baked some potatoes, as I know how you like them with sour cream.” Her eyes crinkled as she smiled.
“Sounds great.” Ben stole another bit of cucumber and ducked out of his mother’s reach as she moved to slap his hand. He chuckled when she missed. She rolled her eyes and turned her focus back to her salad preparations.
Ben leaned against the counter and surveyed the room. The laminate had seen better days. In fact, the whole kitchen was outdated—worn surfaces, old appliances, and a design that was decades out of date. But his mum kept it spotless, scrubbing it daily to within an inch of its life. The saying was really true in this house; they could have eaten off the floor. Ben’s earlier happiness faded.No matter how clean, she really deserves better.
Ben only knew a little of his mum’s childhood because she didn’t like to talk about it, but he’d heard enough to know that she hadn’t had it easy growing up in Sydney. She was the only child of a single mother and didn’t know who her father was. Ben had never met his grandmother, but from what he gathered, she’d not been a homemaker or the maternal type. As a result, Ben’s mum had been passed from relative to relative as her mother sought something from her life apart from motherhood. A better life never eventuated for his grandmother, and she’d eventually succumbed to lung cancer. Ben had no doubt that his mum’s upbringing and lack of a real home and family were what drove her to place such importance on presenting a nice house and keeping the family together, no matter the cost to herself—something he hated. He’d tried to understand why she stayed with his father, tried to make sense of their relationship, and finally thought he’d gotten a grasp of why she made the decisions she did, but he hadn’t found the magic key to getting his mum to see there was another future—a better life for her, a brighter future for the whole family.
As if sensing his thoughts, she looked up from cutting a tomato. She gave another smile. “So, darling, tell me about your week. Good things happening, I hope.”
He knew she was really asking if he’d been out on any dates lately. She wanted him to find that special person, to settle down and get married, and he knew she was aching for some grandchildren to spoil. She was always asking if there was anyone special in his group of friends, hinting that maybe there was something going on that he was keeping from her—very much wishful thinking on her part.
He smiled at her, wishing he could make her dream come true; however, he was unable to lie. Instead he told her about the new job he was working on. But she nodded and smiled and said all the right things as he spoke about his clients and landscape designs and seasonal activities in the garden. She finished prepping the salad as they chatted, then indicated the refrigerator.
Ben opened the door of the fridge and leaned in to get the plates with the steaks just as his father entered.
“Pass me a beer.”
He ignored Ben’s full hands and blocked his way, forcing Ben to juggle the two plates as he reached back into the fridge. “Sure,” Ben muttered under his breath. “Anytime.”
His dad took the can. “Peggy, when will lunch be ready? I’m starving. Surely, you should have the steaks on by now.”
“Sorry, Ian, I thought you’d be in the garden a little longer. You sure made quick work of those lawns.” She smiled at her husband, but Ben could see the strain around her eyes. “The barbeque is all ready, and the steaks will only take fifteen minutes or so. Won’t they, Ben?” She looked at him for reassurance.
“Sure,” he said, pushing past his father. “Won’t be long at all. Mum, I’ll be back in a minute to get the stuff to set the table. Are we eating outside?”
“I thought so, darling. The weather is so beautiful, it would be a shame to be cooped up indoors. Is that all right with you, Ian? A nice meal out on the deck?”
His father hmphed and headed to the living room. The blare of the television confirmed he was going to watch the game.
Trying to ignore his father’s behaviour and the uncertain look on his mother’s face, Ben asked, “Will Maddy be home soon, or is it just us? With the four steaks, I assumed she’d be around.”
He didn’t tell his mother, but he really wanted a chance to talk to Maddy privately, a chance to get the rundown on what was really happening in the house now that he wasn’t living under the same roof as them all. His mum would never speak the truth for fear of causing him to worry, something she’d done his whole life.
“Yes. She’s with Louise at Westfield. They went out shopping for new dresses for Louise’s birthday party, but Maddy is expected back at any time. She said she’d definitely be home for lunch.”
Ben warmed at the thought of Maddy out with her best friend at the big shopping centre nearby, enjoying herself and having a nice party to look forward to. At twenty-four, Ben was five years older than Maddy and had always taken on the protective big brother role. Where his mum’s goal was to keep a roof over their heads and the family together, Ben’s goal was to ensure the happiness of his little sister.
He returned to the barbeque, seasoned the steaks, and got them cooking. Soon the delicious aroma of grilling meat blended with the smells from the garden. He just hoped his mother was right and it would be an enjoyable meal on the deck. He didn’t hold his breath.
* * *
Just as hewas transferring the steaks from the grill to the platter, Maddy came rushing outside and grabbed him from behind. Wrapping her arms around his waist and laying her cheek on his back, she greeted him.
“It’s so good to see you, big brother.” She gave him a squeeze. “I’ve missed you.”
“Careful. Let me put these down.” He crossed the short distance and placed the platter down on the table before turning and giving Maddy a big hug. “I missed you too. You good, kiddo? All okay?”
Before she could answer, the booming voice of their father interrupted. “About time those steaks were done.” He scraped a chair back from the table before dropping his ample frame into the seat. “Maddy, go inside and help your mother and bring me back a glass,” he ordered as he placed the bottle of whiskey on the table with a thump.
They moved apart, and Ben gave Maddy a look, a look they’d perfected over the years, one that said, “I love you, and we’ll talk soon.”
As Maddy headed back inside, she passed their mother, who was carrying the last of the food to the table. Ben waited for his mum to set down the tomato salad and sit before taking his usual place at the table.
He was grateful that he was sitting to the right of his father so he didn’t have to look at him during the meal. Instead, he could focus on his sister seated opposite or his mother at the other end. And if they were lucky, his father would only be interested in his meal and leave the three of them to talk in peace.
“I found a dress, Mum,” Maddy said, as she placed a tumbler in front of her father before taking her own seat. “You should see it. It’s absolutely gorgeous! The most divine shimmery silver colour, and the skirt just floats. I can’t wait to dance in it.” The words rushed out, and her big grin reflected her excitement.
