Sunday afternoon, we all packed up and I drove Rosie home, fighting to keep the smile on my face. The other shoe was bound to drop and my stomach was tumbling like a washing machine at the thought. The kiss she placed on my lips before entering her building lingered for my entire drive toCora’s.
Maybe this could work out? Maybe for once, I’d catch a fucking break.
I could have gone straight home to shower and clean up after the drive, but I was itching to get back to work. It had been years since I’d taken a weekend break and I wanted to see it with my own two eyes. Steve and Tim had been holding down the fort. I knew Steve would have called if anything had gone wrong. And despite how often I’d checked my messages, nothing had come through.
When I pulled up outsideCora’s, dread curled in my veins and my stomach twisted into an old familiar knot.I shouldn’t feel like this going to work.
I used to love this place. It used to be the reason I got up in the morning; it was everything to me. Seeing it slowly crumble, bit by bit, felt like I was watching her die all over again. Cancer is rarely quick. It doesn’t come in one sweeping moment of terror, snatching the thing you love from your grasp overnight. Mum’s was slow. Stealing pieces of her every week, but leaving her alive long enough to feel every ache and pain. My hand flexed on the wheel as I took some deep breaths before I got out. I slammed the car door shut with more force than I meant.
Three days passedand I was drowning in emails. Each one marked urgent. From the bank, to suppliers, to the few standing delivery orders we’d received, I’d been rushed off my feet. Too busy to have more than a few minutes to talk to my brother on the phone and listen to his whining about all the free time he was swimming in.
I scrolled through each one of the red tinted emails, all the tension I’d worked out over the weekend coming back. Muscles coiling with every word I read.
Overdue.
Denied.
Insufficient funds.Yeah, no shit.
I couldn’t bring myself to regret taking the time off, not when it had given me the time with Rosie. Not when it had been the catalyst to our relationship shifting. She had finally broken down that wall, the one stopping her from giving me that last puzzle piece. A part of me had half been expecting for her to do a one eighty now that we were back home. Each time she called me, or a message flashed up on my screen, I held my breath, waiting to see if this was the one that told me she’d changed her mind. That it was all a big mistake.
Picking up the phone with a lump in my throat, she surprised me every time. She would send me pictures of quotes from the book she was reading—usually of the smutty variety—or of Roxy sprawled out on her bed looking just as adorable as the woman sending me them.
God, I was in love with her. The undeniable certainty came crashing into my consciousness like a tank through a brick wall.I loved her. Wasinlove with her. And the strangest feeling of all was that I didn’t need her to love me back. I wanted it, fuck Icravedhearing those words fall from herlips. But I didn’t need it. If the only thing she gave me was her time, her affection, and her mind in all its random glory, I’d be the happiest man alive.
It was eight o’clock in the evening and I was itching to get home to call Rosie, but I had at least five more invoices I needed to file before I could leave.Fuck, I missed her.The texts and calls here and there weren’t enough. My skin itched to grab my phone and tell her I was coming over. Screw work.
Tim had gone home an hour ago and Steve was locking up for the night—Icouldpack up for the night. Staring at the bright laptop screen perched on my desk, the numbers blurred together. Maybe I just needed to go home and get some sleep.
I was about to slam my computer shut when a tentative knock sounded on my office door.
‘Boss?’ Steve called from the other side of the door.
So much for that.Removing all hints of frustration from my tone, I called, ‘Come in.’
He popped his head around the door, leaving the other half of him hovering in the hallway. ‘You have a minute?’
Pushing my laptop to the side, I waved a hand at him. ‘Of course.’
The rest of him entered, faded blue jeans stained with mud, grey hair coming out of the ponytail dangling down his back.
He shut the door behind him and took a seat on the chair opposite my desk. Weathered hands wrung together in a move of uncharacteristic self-consciousness. His eyes were darting around the room, looking everywhere but at me.
After what felt like an age, he finally piped up. ‘This is ah, a little awkward.’ The older man scratched the back of his head.
‘What is it, Steve?’ I pressed, getting more anxious thelonger he sat there trying to figure out what he wanted to say.
‘The thing is boss, my uh, oh heavens, I’m no good at this type of thing.’ The lines on his forehead creased deeper.
Fuck. Whatever had him tongue tied wasn’t going to be good.
‘Whatever it is, I'm sure we can get it sorted,' I spoke with a forced smile, more to try and comfort myself than him. I could handle whatever it was he wanted, unless he was asking for a pay rise and then I might hurl. Steve had been with me since the beginning. The thought of losing him when everything around me was barely hanging on by a thread made my heart gallop off in an unsteady rhythm.
Steve sighed and continued, ‘Margery’s much better at things like this,’ he said softly, mentioning his wife of nearly forty years.
‘Steve—’
‘The last month's payments haven't come through,’ he blurted out. ‘I know things aren’t going well at the minute and usually, I wouldn’t think much of it, but I’ve got my grandchildren?—’
