“Do I need to beg you?” I whispered, the ache in my throat making the words ragged. “There is no ‘just Elara’ for me. You are the axis my world spins on. Without you, the money, the name, the power—it’s just noise in an empty house.”
I saw her own eyes fill with tears, saw the panic I was causing, and it only made the spiral worse.
“I’m here, Julian. I’m not going anywhere. I just need to find myself before I make any more lifelong decisions.”
“You want to find yourself?” I pushed up from the bed, snatching my boxers from the floor. “Fine. Find yourself. See how fucking lonely it is out there.”
“Julian, wait—”
Her voice was a broken plea. It almost stopped me. Almost. I didn't turn back.
“Take all the time you need,” I said, the words cold and hard. “You’ll bend until you almost break for the Ashworths, but you won’t even marry me. Fuck it.”
I walked out, leaving her in the rumpled, cooling sheets.
Five minutes later, the cold air of the living room bit my bare skin. I paced, rage and shame warring in my chest. I’d fucked it up. I’d taken the most perfect, sated moment and poisoned it with my need.
Her words echoed:Too soon. I need to breathe. Find myself.
I stopped pacing and replayed it all. I sank onto the sofa, dropping my head into my hands. I saw it then, with brutal clarity. I was doing to her exactly what the Ashworths had done—dictating the terms of her existence. I was offering a gilded cage of my own making and calling it freedom.
“Selfish bastard,” I muttered into the silence.
Chapter 31
Julian
I found a bakery. I’d thought about baking her another cake, but that would take too long, and every second she spent alone with the echo of my words was another second I’d failed her. My parents showed me what love looks like, but Elara only knew what a cage looked like. To her, the whole world was a series of bars.
I had to build a wider sky. I had to let her breathe in it. If I was going to keep her, it had to be because she chose to stay—not because she felt cornered by my desperation.
When I slipped back into the bedroom twenty minutes later, the lights were still off. She was a small, still shape in the center of the bed, the blankets pulled tight around her like armor. I set the small, white box on her nightstand.
“Lemon-blueberry,” I said quietly. “With the cream cheese frosting you like.”
She didn’t move.
I sat on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipping under my weight. I didn’t touch her; I didn't want my hands to feel like another set of shackles. “I was wrong,” I said to the dark. “When you said it was too soon, I didn’t hear caution, Elara. I heard ano. I heard you slipping away from me, and it terrified me. I reacted like a child because the thought of losing you—afterfinally having you—felt like someone was tearing my ribs open from the inside.”
I heard a soft, wet sniff from beneath the blankets.
“You can have all the time you need,” I whispered. “A month. A year. However long it takes for you to just beyou. To wake up and decide what you want without the ghost of an obligation in the room.”
I finally reached out, letting my fingers brush the tear-damp hair at her temple. “I will be here. As the man who loves you. As the man who is so damn proud of you for wanting that space, he can barely stand it.”
The blankets shifted. She turned, her face pale and ravaged by tears in the faint city light. Her lower lip trembled.
“I love you,” she choked out. “It’s only ever been you. I just… I need to walk to you on my own two feet. Not run to you because I'm fleeing something else. Not have you carry me across a finish line I didn't earn.”
My heart cracked clean open. I gathered her into my arms, sheets and all, and pulled her against my chest. She came willingly, burying her face in the crook of my neck, her body shaking with silent, cathartic sobs.
“Then walk, sweetheart,” I murmured into her hair, rocking her gently. “I’m not going anywhere. The road is yours. I’ll be waiting at the end of it.” I paused, kissing her forehead. “With cupcakes.”
She let out a watery, hiccupping sound that was almost a laugh.
Chapter 32
Elara
