Chapter Fourteen
Xolani
Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
– Alfred Lord Tennyson
Xolani missed him.Sorrow filled her and the experience felt like a knife to the heart.
She felt him everywhere.In her heart, mind, at the coffee shop, her office, her home but he wasn’t with her.It hurt.The fact that she’d told him to leave, to stay away from her even pained her now.But he’d hurt her with his deception.She scoffed at herself.Wasn’t that his true nature?A deceiver?He’d wanted her, but he didn’t love or want her in the way she needed him to.She’d been thinking long and hard about what Felipe and Dr.Fairee had told her about him being her mate.
What if it was true?
He’d left her bereft.Physically and mentally by giving her what she’d asked for.She wasn’t sure what hurt more, him doing what she asked or what he’d done before she’d found out who he really was.A demon.An incubus to be exact.A being who purposefully enticed and had sex with a multitude of women.
Not one woman butwomen.
The ache in her chest suffocated her so much that she was surprised she hadn’t fainted.She missed his delicious mouth and the way he stroked her body and came inside her.The heat of him as he pressed into her.Hell, she missed the fact that he could speak to her mind as well as to her body.
Xolani had gone back to work to get him off her mind and yet it hadn’t helped.Sleep wasn’t an issue anymore.Now she was dealing with a broken heart.Broken hearted and daydreaming of Dima.Or should she say Dirge.He’d said that was his demon’s name.Dirge or Dima.She didn’t care.She just wanted the pain and longing gone.
It had been explained to her that Dima was her mate.The irony of that didn’t cease to astound her.Xolani Coleman was promised to a demon.Which made him powerful in his own right.But what did that make her?She was only a human.How did she fit into his world?Could she fit there?Beyond that did she need to fit into his world?
None of this mattered if she kept her distance.He’d tried to come around for a while, but she’d put a stop to it.She wouldn’t even listen to her best friend on the matter of at least listening to him.To at least talk to him.
Getting up from her desk, she walked to the window to look out.She’d finished with her last patient for the day and now she was feeling the weight of her breakup if that’s what one would call it with Dima.
He’d tried to apologize and to convince her that what they’d felt for each other was real.But how could she trust him?He’d come into her life because he’d been obsessed with her and wanted to get her out of his system.She was constantly feeling the pull to call him.But what if this wasn’t real?What if his feelings for her weren’t genuine?
Xolani struggled to not let despair drag her down.
A tap sounded on her door and the office manager Claudia stuck her silver head in.“Everyone is gone for the day.I’m leaving as well.Do you need anything before I go, Dr.Coleman?”
She mustered up a smile and replied, “No, go on and leave, I’ll lock up for the day.Thanks for asking.”
Claudia nodded.“Have a great night.”
“Thank you.See you next week.”
The office manager waved and said goodbye and closed the door gently behind her.
Xolani turned back to gaze out the window.All she needed to do was to say his name and then perhaps the pain would stop.She deserved answers for what had gone on with him.Didn’t she?Hell yes, she deserved to at least cuss him out and get this off her chest.She loved him, but she refused to be a pushover.The situation between her and Dima needed to be rectified one way or the other.It had become awful because she hadn’t been willing to change or give an inch weeks ago.But now she was willing to listen.
Xolani had to admit she wanted to see him.
Making her way to the couch, she settled down.Taking a deep breath and centering herself, she whispered his name, “Dima.”
If she didn’t know he was a demon, him appearing in front of her like he did would have terrified her.She’d come to grips with that fact.
“You called.”
