"You've been ill." He started to withdraw his hand, but she held on. "I want to be kissed. It's been so long since we..."
"We have a guest and very soon, mother will be on her way."
Her eyes moistened. "Do I look that bad? Is that the real reason you no longer want me?"
She wasn't prepared for the kindling of fire from his eyes as he drew away from her and rose. "Not want you?" He exploded between clenched teeth. "Not want you? I cannot sleep from wanting you. Goddammit it! I want you so much, I'm dying."
"But if I touch you, if I kissed you, I wouldn't be able to stop. And you're not well. You're still too bloody thin. I would be a monster."
He turned away. "I'll let the housekeeper know mother is coming over." He glanced at his watch, his expression under rigid control. "We should be back by then."
She sat there staring at the doorway dumbfounded. All along he had been completely composed except that one time he had lost his temper at the clinic. And from then, he had been scrupulously polite and courteous, taking great pains not to touch her.
She had been having moments of doubt, thinking that he really didn't want her anymore. That the proposal had been a way to stand up to his obligations. She had been torturing herself into thinking that it was because of the visit from Carrie and the residual guilt that had prompted him to act.
And when he discovered she was pregnant, he had stepped up to do the right thing. She had taken one look at herself in themirror and decided there was no way any man, especially one of Rodney's look and charisma could find her attractive.
Taking a deep breath, she felt hope and sunshine spreading inside her chest. He still wanted her! If that was the only thing, she could work with it. In time, she was going to gain his trust again. As long as the feelings were still there, she was fine.
But oh, she longed to feel him against her! It was getting to the point where she could not sleep either.
*****
"You're very good at this." Rodney murmured as he watched the boy swing the bat and hit the ball. The batting cage was empty, which was deliberate. It belonged to a friend who had agreed to have the place vacated for the hour they would be there.
"Mom used to do this with me." David slammed the ball and did a jig. "She's very good for a girl."
Rodney grinned at the sexist remark. "I bet you'd never say that to her face."
David grinned back. "Nope. She'd cream me." He twisted his wrists forward and backwards. "The balls need to reload. This is a cool spot. The one where mom and I used to go is kinda crummy."
"What do you mean, crummy?" Rodney hefted a bat and prepared to take his swing.
"There were drug addicts and homeless people hanging around."
Golden eyes met mahogany ones. "Really?"
David nodded. "One of the guys tried to get fresh with mom one time and she kneed him in the cro..."
He pointed downwards to his groin. "His thing."
"I see." Hiding a smile, Rodney swung and hit. "How big was he?"
"Big." The boy demonstrated by lifting his hand over his head. "He called her a dirty name. She told him there was plenty more where that came from and calmly went back to batting. She's cool like that."
"Sounds that way. And very brave too."
David nodded. "She's the best." He glanced at Rodney. "Are you mad at her?"
The blunt question had Rodney bobbling his bat.
Turning to look at the boy, he noticed the intense expression. "Why would you ask that?"
He gave a sheepish grin. "I heard her telling her friend Carrie that you don't touch her. But you do, I've seen you lift her up."
"Hmm." Rodney had to hide a smile. The kid was very observant and had a penchant for eavesdropping. "Does your mom know you have this nasty habit?"
Ducking his head, he kicked at the tufted grass. "She's always saying I have big ears. I guess that means I'm nosy. Are you going to tell her?"
