Stopping, she stares at me in surprise. “Mr. Brenin?”
I take the tray from her and set it on the landing. “It’s Haven…” Her name feels heavy on my tongue.
Terror flashes across her features. “Is she all right? Sir? Sir! Is she all right?”
“Emma, please.” I try to calm her some, but the panic in her eyes doesn’t lessen.
“Oh no,” she whispers, shaking her head. “He’s killed her, hasn’t he? He’s done it this time, I just know it.”
So, she knows the truth, too? Was I the only one in the dark all this time?
“I-I haven’t seen Haven for about an hour or so,” I say. “She was alive, but very weak then.”
The color in her cheeks only fades more.
“Emma, how long have you known what’s been happening to Haven?”
“I always have. Haven’t you?”
My wobbly legs force me to move down a step. She’d thought I’d known? Did Haven think that, too? Had everyone else labeled me with such cruelty?
“Oh my… You didn’t know, did you?” She glances at Lysander, who’s been watching us from the bottom step. “We always assumed you had known.”
We.She means her and Haven. That confirms it. Haven really thinks that I am capable of something this heinous. She thinks I’m like Henri.
Acid burns the back of my throat and vomit threatens to follow.
“Don’t you see his face?” Lysander’s sharp tone helps my mind focus again. “Of course, he didn’t know.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Emma says, lowering her head in shame. “I did not mean to offend you.”
“No, no need to be sorry, Emma. I just wish I’d found out sooner.”
This is my fault.I’d had so many opportunities to stop it and had missed every one.
“I have to see her.” Emma turns and half-runs up the stairs again.
“Are you sure you’ll be allowed?” I ask.
At the top, she pauses. “Yes, it’s my chore to change the dressings on the lord’s bed.” The muscles in her throat work to swallow, as if she’s trying to suppress a disturbing memory, and I don’t even what to think of what that may be.
“Please, Emma, find me after you see her,” I choke out. “I need to know how she is.”
She gives me a solemn nod. “I will, sir.” Then she rushes down the hall, disappearing from sight.
Haven
There’s a gentle knock on the door, followed by the high-pitched whine of hinges as it opens. My body is heavy. Too heavy to maneuver. Even my eyelids hurt when I open them, but when my vision focuses, I see Emma’s petite frame stepping into the room.
Relief fills me as she hurries to the side of the bed and turns the small knob on the gas lamp above the bed. Gold light floods the dark space, burning my eyes and causing me to squeeze them shut again.
How long have I been asleep? It feels like years, yet not long enough still. Everything hurts, aches, and whenever I breathe, a sharp pain invades my lungs. I wiggle my fingers, which are still bound above my head by rope. They tingle with numbness, but at least there’s some feeling.
Emma places her hand on my right cheek, being careful not to touch the healing cut there. “I was so worried,” she murmurs, her voice trembling. “Oh, thank God you’re alive…”
I try to smile for her, to reassure her, but even my lips hurt.
Then Emma does something shocking. She leans forward, drapes herself over me, and wraps her skinny arms around my middle in a sort of hug. It’s painful and a bit strange, but it warms me to the core. After so much coldness, it’s overwhelming to have someone care about me.
