“Ican’t,okay. I can’t explain it, but he’s just… There’s just somethin’ about him that drives me up the fuckin’ wall, and Ineedhim, okay?” For some reason, my chest is heaving, and my eyes sting. I chug the rest of my drink before I can say anything more.
“This sounds serious.”
“It is… I think.”
“Does he know that?” they ask, and I can’t help but snort.
“No.”
Kaser’s brows draw inward. “And why not?”
“Because he’s kind of terrified of me still,” I admit in a mumble.
“Why.” Not a question but a demand.
“Because I’ve kinda been stalking him for the last few weeks,” I let all the words out in a rush and then curl my lips inward after I’ve finished as I wait for Kaser to reprimand me.
“Cedrick,” they say after a minute of just staring at me, “you stupid mother fucker.”
I blow out a breath. “I know.”
“What the hell did you think was gonna happen? That he was just gonna suddenlynotbe scared of you?”
I shrug. “I kinda like that he’s scared of me,” I admit with a half-grin.
Kaser rolls their eyes, but I catch their own lips twitching. “Of course, you do. But stalking someone isn’t the way?—”
“He won’t talk to me any other way,” I argue.
“How do you know that?”
I narrow my eyes. “I just do.”
“Did you even try?”
“Fuck you,” I snap, then try to take another gulp of my drink before realizing, with a frown, that I’ve already finished it off.
“Don’t get snippy with me, buddy. I’m just pointing out the obvious, which you clearly can’t see because you’re too close.”
“I’m not too close. But he won’t want anything to do with me if I’m not Static,” I snap the truth I’ve been trying to avoid thinking about ever since that night.
Kase’s face softens, and I hate it. “Why do you think that?”
“Because I know it’s the fuckin’ truth, okay? He only wanted what was covered in makeup and tattered clothes. And that’s fine. I can give that to him. It’s easy to be him because sometimes, I feel like I’m Static more than I am Cedrick.”
“But you’re both.”
“He doesn’t want both.”
“But you don’t know that, Ced. You haven’t even tried.”
“And I’m not gonna fuckin’ risk losin’ him over it, either. I know he wants Static, so that’s what I’m stickin’ with.”
“Risk losing him…” They repeat my words softly, and I wince. For fuck’s sake.
“Pretend I didn’t say that,” I snap.
“I can’t.”
