I just needed…
Fuck.
“Yeah. Yeah, m’good.”
“What happened?” he asks again, and I’m shaking my head even though he can’t see me from where my phone hangs at my side. “Cedrick, I’m worried.”
“Just…”Don’t lie.“My heart is burnin’.”
“Heartburn? Shit. Yeah, that does suck. I’m sorry.” And he does sound genuinely sorry. But that’s not what I meant. I meant my heart literally feels like it’s on fuckin’fire.But if he wants to assume heartburn, I’m gonna let him because there ain’t no way in hell I’m correctin’ him.
Not now.
Not ever.
I can’t.
It’ll scare him away for good.
Madison can’t handle me at my fullest, and he sure as shit can’t handlethiskinda truth.
I slowly bring the phone back up to my face and give Madison the best smile I can, but it’s more like a grimace than anything else.
“Oh, yeah, you look like you’re in pain. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s all right, darlin’.”
My realization is still burning hot in my chest, and it’s making it hard to focus on anything other than that, but I need to stop thinkin’ about it before I literally choke.
“Your question,” I say after a moment. Madison’s eyebrows draw together in confusion.
“Question?” he parrots.
“Your text. About if I was jealous.”
“Oh.” His face turns a beautiful shade of pink, even in the darkness of his room, and I revel in it.Yes.This is what I need. Power over him, not the other way around.
“Yes.”
“Yes?”
“The answer is yes.”
“But-but why?”
“Because you find him attractive,” I tell him bluntly, hating the words as I speak them into existence.
“What?” he squawks, and I can see the denial on the tip of his tongue.
“Don’t deny it, darlin’. It’s okay. Just don’t lie to me, please.”
Madison pulls in a deep breath, then lets it out slowly. “Okay… yes. I did find him attractive when I first moved in, but I haven’t acted on those feelings, and I haven’t even felt anything since—” he cuts himself off sharply, and I feel a sly grin spread across my painted face.
“Since…” I drawl, teasing him, knowing what’s coming next.
“Since you,” he finishes in a mumble, and I let the grin overtake my face, cracking and splitting the paint.
“Since me.”
