His breath fluttered on my neck and that familiar heat coursed through me again. This was insane. This was Patrick Tetlow, of These Exiles. My favourite band.
And now we were curled up close in a booth in my favourite cafe as he muttered hastily under his breath.
‘– appreciate it if you didn’t post about this,’ he was saying quietly, his earnest eyes far too dazzling. I mean, a girl could fall in there and do herself some serious damage. ‘Last thing I want – I’m sure you understand –’
‘What? Yeah. Yeah, fine,’ I managed to say, a little stunned. ‘Yeah, I won’t post about this.’
Post about this? No, just dream about it, fantasize about it, be unable to stop seeing the vision of it painted on my retinas whenever I closed my eyes …
I mean, I was definitely going to tell Laura. And Anna. But that wasn’t the same thing.
Patrick’s shoulders slumped with obvious relief. ‘Great. Because I do not need this right now.’
Wow, rude.‘No problem. I get it.’ I mean, I didn’t, but it was fine. There was no way people would even believe me. The pictures on his profile hadn’t looked anything like him. What the hell was he even doing on Butterflies?
God, Laura was going to freak.
‘OK, great. Well, I’ve got to head off –’ Patrick moved to stand, looking around at the other cafegoers before tipping his head back down at me – ‘but, thanks and … and sorry about this,’ he finished awkwardly, like he wasn’t quite sure what we he was apologizing for.
Was it for forcing a vow of silence upon me, or the ghosting I’d called him out on?
Guess I’d never know.
‘Seriously, it’s no problem. And, yeah, I’ve got to go too,’ I lied. The last thing I wanted to do was stay here and overthink everything that had just happened.
We made our way to the cafe doors, weird silence hovering between us. This was insane. Had I fallen asleep in my booth? Oh God, was I drooling?
This had to be a dream.
‘I’ve got it.’ Patrick was holding the door open. I blinked, before smiling.
‘Thank –’ I went to thank him but was assailed by shouts the instant we stepped outside.
‘Patrick – Patrick, look here!’
‘Over here, Patrick, smile –’
‘Who’s the woman, Patrick?’
‘Dating again, Patrick? Are you over Celine?’
No. No, this was not happening –
‘Patrick Tetlow, new girlfriend? Smile for the front page!’
And my vision was blinded by the camera flash.
FOUR
I’ll take the fire, I’ll take the quake, I’ll take the storm but for heaven’s sake – don’t leave me, don’t leave me in this disaster, run faster, no master, don’t leave me in this disaster …
–from ‘Disaster’, by These Exiles
‘I DON’T SEE THE problem,’ this Derek guy was saying, smiling at my sister, who was smiling back.
Traitor.
‘You don’t see the problem?’ I repeated, my voice echoing strangely around the hotel room that the These Exiles publicist had booked for our meeting.
