“It’s inevitable.” Her voice is soft, broken.
I search her face. “What is?”
Her chest rises and falls, but she doesn’t look away from me. “You leaving.” She slides out around me, walking deeper into the alley. “My entire life, people have disappointed me. Shit, Hayes, you saw my parents in there. All I am to them is a prize. Did they ever think about what that does to me? No. Did my dad think about me having to go to school and have people whispering behind my back—or worse, when they’d say it to my face? It’s just easier this way.
So, I made a list…”
“What kind of a list?”
She turns away, and mumbles something under her breath.
“What?” I inch forward.
“It’s stupid, but it’s a reminder for me.”
“I’m lost, Leighton.”
She pulls out her phone, opens her Notes app, and hands it over to me.
“Safe Guy Shortlist?” I glance up at her. “Texts back promptly… treats service workers well… not a risktaker… ready for a family?”
She takes her phone out of my hands and closes the screen, shoving it back in her purse.
“Do not tell me that’s what you’re using to find a man?” I can’t hide the judgment or annoyance in my tone.
“This way, there are no expectations, and I don’t have to feel like anyone disappointed me. Because… I wrote the list.” She turns around as the sun peeks out from behind a cloud, warming her face in a soft glow.
“So, they have to check every box?” I need specifics if I’m going to squash this.
“The majority… yes.”
“Done.”
She frowns. “What?”
“I can be that man.”
“I hate to break it to you, but you’re far from that guy.” Hurt stabs at my heart, but I splash on a cocky grin to mask it.
“Why do you say that? You looking for an accountant or some office guy who works Monday through Friday, nine to five?”
“Listen, Hayes, you’re great and yes, you check off a lot of those boxes, but I don’t want to put you in that position.”
“What position?”
She shakes her head. “A position where I’ll hate you.”
I’m still so confused. “Help me understand this.”
She walks back toward me, looking resigned. “Fine, you want to know everything? Here it is—I always had a crush on you, but you were Callie’s brother, and we both know how she felt about her friends crushing on you.” She raises her hand above her head. “Right now, you’re here, Hayes. And if I let you keep being my savior, inevitably you’re going to be here.” She brings her hand all the way down to her knees.
I’m still processing the first part. She liked me? “You had or have a crush on me?” I break the distance.
“That’s what you got from that?”
“The rest is bullshit, and nothing I can’t prove wrong.”
She snakes along the wall, trying to escape me, but I step in front of her. Her back presses against the brick just like before.
