Dreya’s voice was quiet. “I’m here for family as well. We live in the slums of Talloport. With me here, they’ll never starve again. And if I’d died…one less mouth to feed.”
Hadley snorted. “I couldn’t stand that place a moment longer. After my father died, it was this or whoring.”
Roman’s eyes were hard as flint. “I’m here to kill Fae. The more of those bastards I gut, the better.”
One by one, their gazes found me over the flames, as if it were my turn to share.
I picked at the dense bread in my hands. “I couldn’t handle it anymore.” I shrugged, picking a close enough truth.
Hadley barked a humourless laugh. “I’ve heard the rumours. They say you’re insane. But I didn’t think you werestupid.”
“You don’t know anything about me,” I said, venom lacing my voice.
“Oh, you poor spoilt, little thing, it must have been hard living in a beautiful castle, being fed every night and havinga warm bed to sleep in. You wouldn’t have lasted a day in the slums below your pampered fucking feet, people kill over food scraps and freeze on the street!”
The darkness hit like a fever, flooding my veins, tearing through every restraint I had left.
My vision split, everything sharpening, humming. I didn’t remember moving, only the sound of Hadley’s breath catching as my hand wrapped around her throat. My fingers squeezed against her windpipe and her face reddened, her mouth open in a soundless scream. I could feel a strange pull coming from inside of her. It almost felt like water, vibrating beneath her skin and waiting for me to control it.
“Let go of your squad mate, initiate,” Orin said from behind me. But I couldn’t. I needed to hurt her. No. I wanted todrownher. I reached for the water in her body with my mind. I could feel every single molecule. I tugged at it. Hadley’s hazel eyes bulged, her body shaking as she scratched furiously at my hand.
“Lyra, I can feel your anger. I’m going to help you calm down. Okay?” Bohdi’s voice cut through my haze. But Hadley’s body began to slump, the fight dying from her eyes. Her skin turned a beautiful shade of purple, red splotches blooming on her throat around my hands. Bohdi stood behind me, gripping my shoulders. I could feel him pushing against my mind, offering me calmness. I pushed against it, slamming a wall of water over my mind. Bohdi cursed under his breath and drew his hands back as if they were burnt.
“Orin, I can’t,” Bohdi said, shocked.
“Let go now, Lyra!” Orin yelled. But I didn’t care. I pulled at those little water threads harder, pushing them towards her lungs. My hand squeezed tighter against the frantic pulse fluttering at my fingertips.
Drown.
A hand wrapped around my forearm. Gentle. Tentative.
“Eyes on me, Princess.” My head snapped up. Grey eyes, with dancing flecks of amber filled my vision. Like the sun breaking through a storm. I gasped, fingers loosening slightly.
“Good girl. Now, please let go of Hadley,” Riven urged. I don’t know why I listened, or how he cut through the darkness, but my fingers went slack. Hadley choked on a ragged breath, crumpling forward, coughing and spluttering. The haze over my vision lifted, leaving only the terrible clarity of what I’d done. I let my hands fall to my sides.
Roman and Bohdi were already there, hauling her upright by the elbows. Orin pressed his thumb to his brow, muttering a curse that burned more than if he’d shouted.
“Let’s get her to the infirmary,” he ordered, then his sharp gaze cut to me. “I’ll deal with you later.”
I took a stumbling step back, my eyes fixed on the purple bruises blooming across Hadley’s throat, perfect imprints of my fingers.
“It’s alright, Lyra.” Riven’s voice slipped through my daze, steady where mine had fled. Orin led Hadley towards the barracks, his expression unreadable. I could only stare, words lodged behind the tightness in my chest. I should feel remorse. Guilt for hurting someone. Shame for letting the darkness take over. But all I felt was anger. Anger at myself. The Gods for willing me to live against my will.
Riven slipped an arm around my shoulders. I flinched at the contact, but didn’t pull away.
“Come on,” he murmured, leading me to the cliff we had climbed through the night before. Dreya walked quietly next to us, the curious stares of the other squads followingus. Their gazes felt like a physical weight, suffocating me. The wind clawed at my flushed cheeks as we reached the cliff’s edge. The Dead Sea writhed below, its waves shattering against the black-pebbled shore like a thousand furious hearts beating out of time.
I took a deep breath, the salt sinking into my lungs and tingling through my veins soothingly.
“I don’t think she will bother you again after that,” Dreya said hesitantly, picking up a rock and throwing it into the waves. She eyed me with a mix of curiosity and wariness, as if she expected me to lash out at any moment.
“I didn’t mean to lose control like that,” I muttered, arms wrapping tightly around myself. My body could still feel the heat of Hadley’s pulse beneath my fingers, the way it faltered when I’d squeezed too hard. The way I had liked it. Ihatedthat I liked it.
Dreya picked up another rock, studying it in her hands. “It’s this place. We went into the Dead Sea and lived. It unmade us. Our bodies are changing. Becoming stronger. Faster. Soon, we will have our Sanctum. I think a temper tantrum here and there is allowed.”
I watched her rock disappear, claimed by the violent waves. But that wasn’t the first time I had touched the sea and craved more. Even after drowning during Ascension, I longed to go back.
“Did the sea drown you?” I murmured absently. Perhaps it happened to everyone.
