The voices circle and clash, threatening to tear me apart from the inside.
Today, he doesn’t bother to knock. He just enters quietly and sits down on the sofa beside me.
“You’re out of bed.” Not a question. An observation of a small victory.
I smile, barely a tip of my lips. Not from joy, but because that’s what’s expected of the Princess.
Kiernan sighs, a deep sound that accompanies him running his hands through his hair, his head bowing.
“Speak to me, Alaya. Tell me what’s wrong. Did I push you too hard?”
His words of self-blame cut deep, and tears well unexpectedly, blurring my vision.
“I don’t deserve you,” I whisper.
He reaches out and tips my chin up to look into his face.
“No, you deserve more. I want to help you. Let me.”
Something shifts in my chest. A small crack in the numbness.
Quinn. My brother.
The one person in Heartwood who didn’t ask anything of me, who didn’t demand I choose. Who was just … family. Innocent in all of this. If I could just see him, talk to him, maybe I could find a way to reconcile the two halves of myself tearing me apart.
“Can you help me speak to Quinn?” The question escapes me like a breath held too long.
Kiernan’s expression shifts—surprise, then understanding. He walks over to lean on the mantel by the fire, and stares back at me. The flames reflect in his eyes.
“Your brother? That was quite a shock. Did you know?”
“I met him in Heartwood, but no. I’m not even sure he knew his past.” I sit up straighter, the blanket falling from my shoulders. “I need to speak to him. Can you help?”
“I can try. The King has kept him close, in a suite near his own since he arrived.” A hint of doubt colours his voice.
“Can we go now?”
He studies me for a long moment, and I see the relief dawn on his face—relief that I’m asking for something—anything—that I’m reaching towards the kingdom again instead of drowning in it.
He laughs softly, crossing to the sofa and holding out both hands. I place mine in his and stand, falling into his familiar embrace when his arms encircle me and hold me to his chest.
“It’s nice to see that spark of interest in your eyes again, Princess.” He pulls back slightly. “Will you do me a favour if I take you to Quinn?”
“Depends on the favour.” I lean back and raise my eyebrows at him.
“I don’t like you being here alone. Will you consider moving to our suite, the one intended for when we were married?”
I stare back into his pleading eyes and realise I want nothing more than to finally start our married life, to be with him. To begin the quiet moments of discovery we’d been denied.
“Do we get a big bed?” I tease.
His arms tighten around me, and his chest vibrates with laughter as he kisses the top of my head.
“I can’t wait to wake up beside you every day, wife,” he replies, his voice husky.
The hallway narrows as we ascend to the third floor, the ornate doors of the King’s personal quarters looming just beyond.
Kiernan’s voice drops to a whisper as we approach Quinn’s suite. “We need to be careful. My father’s watchful gaze rarely strays from his suite.”
