We lay in silence for an impossibly long time. I even glance over at Piper to make sure she didn’t fall asleep on me, but her eyes are wide open. “What’s wrong Pipes?”
She takes a few deep breaths, and starts tugging on the hem of her coat the way she’s always done when she is nervous. That’s one thing we both have in common. The nervous tugs. “I know why you’re angry at Spencer,” she finally says. “But none of it was his fault. I need you to believe me when I say that. None of it was his fault. It was mine.”
I turn awkwardly in my seat so that I’m facing her, and I grab her hand, squeezing it tight across the center console. “What do you mean it was your fault?”
My chest feels tight, and my heart is pounding so fast I feel as though it’s moments from exploding out of my chest. We’ve never talked about Spencer kissing her. The first and only time we talked about it was when I walked in on them kissing at the Winter Formal. She told me he kissed her, and that she had no part in wanting it. I never brought it up with Spencer because I was humiliated that he asked me to be his date, when he obviously wanted my sister the entire time.
A tear escapes her eye, and I watch in silence as it rolls down her cheek and disappears into her hair.
“I—I asked him to lie to you, or I guess, to let me lie to you,” she says after a minute. “It’s all so stupid now that I look back on it, but even though I know it’s stupid, I’ve still let him lie for me all this time because I’m a coward, Phoebe. I’ve been lying to you, to everyone about who I truly am for years. My entire life really. And for what? Because I was afraid you guys would shun me? Be ashamed of me?” She’s full blown crying now, and I’m still confused as ever.
“Piper, we could never shun you.Icould never shun you. You’re half of my heart and I would be lost without you. You’re my soulmate, my twin. We’re in that whole ‘If I jump, you jump’ thing for life. You know that, right?”
“I know. I know. Which is why this is going to sound so damn stupid, and I’m so sorry for lying to you this entire time. I just can’t stand by and watch what you and Spencer have be torn to shreds overme.” She squeezes my hand harder, and I know in my gut that this is something huge and monumental for my sister, so I squeeze tighter, holding on for the both of us.
“Okay so here goes,” she says through gritted teeth. “Remember those girls that would bully the hell out of us in school? Well at the dance I overheard them talking about me in the bathroom. They didn’t know I was in there, but what they were saying was horrible. They kept saying over and over again that they thought I was gay…and that they were going to prove it and tell the whole school that I was a lesbian. I panicked. Mostly because I couldn’t imagine you hearing it from them, or for our parents to find out that way,” Piper chokes out through the river of tears streaming down her beautiful face.
“So I ran from the bathroom as soon as I heard them leave, and I ran right into Spencer. The mean girls were right there in line at that stupid photobooth the school set up, and they were laughing at me and pointing. I knew they were going to out me, so I did the only thing that I could do. I grabbed Spencer and I kissed him in front of everyone.”
I inhale sharply at her words, unable to fully process everything she’s just revealed to me.Shekissedhim?
“Anyways, you walked in and I knew I was the worst big sister ever. I knew how much you both liked each other, but I was selfish. And I asked him to lie for me so I could keep my secret safe. Spencer being the greatest guy I’ve ever met, well he agreed to lie, and he’s kept that secret all these years. He agreed to say it was him, so that I wouldn’t lose you. Phoebe, I cannot lose you, but I understand if you hate me and need some time to process all of this.”
I’m angry and I’m hurt. But mostly, I’m relieved and I’m proud. So damn proud of my stupid big sister for being brave enough to admit this all now. I know this isn’t easy for her. Admitting to your family that your sexuality is not what we all assumed it was…well, that takes guts.
I pull my hand out of Piper’s and get out of the car, walking around until I’m at Piper’s door. I yank it open and motion her to get out, and as soon as her door is closed behind her I wrap her into the biggest freaking hug imaginable.
“Piper, I’m so proud of you, and I’m honored that you shared this with me. It all makes so much sense now. All the anime lady posters on the walls, and the serious lack of boy talk. I really should have guessed it years ago,” I joke. “Thank you for trusting me. I love you, and I forgive you.”
Another sobs wracks her body. “You do? You forgive me?”
“Of course I do. You were a kid, and I wouldn’t have ever been smart enough to throw them off like that. Do I hate that it had to be Spencer…on our first date…yes. Yes, I really hate that. But none of that matters now, because now neither of you have to lie to me about it,” I pull her back so I can look at her. “And now I don’t have to worry about the guy I’m sort of crushing on being hung up on my twin sister!”
We both hug some more and laugh even harder.
“Would you actually be up for some twin-only time? Because I’m seeing someone back in Germany…and she’s supposed to Facetime me tonight. I’d really love to introduce you to her if that’d be okay?” Piper's voice is full of hope, and a happiness that I never realized was missing until now.
I link my arm with hers and steer us towards the house. “I would absolutely love to meet her. My stone-man can spend one more night in agony for making me think he wanted to date my sister this entire time. This seems like an acceptable punishment until I’m ready to jump his bones tomorrow.”
That realization washes over me and I want to sing from the rooftops because I’m so thrilled and ecstatic. The weight on my chest that told me I wasn’t enough for him, and that I wasn’twhohe wanted has totally vanished.
Spencer Larson really does wantme.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Spencer
WhenIwakeupthe next morning, I lay in bed and contemplate on what I can do to get Phoebe back for the ‘stone-man’ thing. Seeing her laugh and giggle every time I froze in place after she hissed at me was honestly the best part of my day. That playful, jubilant side of her rarely tends to come out, so it’s truly something special when it does.
I would sell my soul just to see her smile everyday, to live with her in pure happiness and contentment every single day.
There isn’t much time between now and the start of the final task, whatever that might be, but I can’t help but wrap my brain into knots trying to come up with a way to get her to smile today. A real smile, like the one she gave me yesterday in front of her family at the ugly sweater party. It felt like something was changing between us, like the possibility of ‘us’ could actually be a real thing.
Maybe that was just wishful thinking on my part, and Phoebe was just playing nice in front of the entire block of family and friends.
My alarm finally goes off, and it’s officially time to get up, get ready and head to the Andrews’ house to find out what the last task is. If we win this one, Phoebe will finally get crowned the winner, and I want that more than anything. Well, maybe not anything. I’d like to be able to call Phoebe mine for the rest of my life, but baby steps.
I grab my phone to turn off my alarm, and I see three missed calls from Austin, and another two missed calls from Piper. My first thought instantly goes to the worst thing imaginable; someone is hurt, or possibly dead. With shaking fingers, I call Austin back. While I wait for him to answer, I mentally start praying that Mom and Dad are okay. That Phoebe is okay. That her parents are okay.
