Page 2 of My Funny Valentine


Font Size:

“He danced two dances with my Jane!”

“But his first dance was with my Charlotte!”

“I dare say neither of us danced with the most eligible bachelor,” Charlotte interrupted. “Mr Darcy is of much higher consequence than Mr Bingley and kept to his own party.”

Dear Charlotte was always diplomatic in her dealings with the rival matrons of Meryton. Her friendship with the two eldest Bennet sisters had therefore never suffered from the same animosity as that of their quarrelsome mothers.

“He spoke to my Elizabeth!”

Mrs Bennet never knew when to end a discussion. She thought she had won when the entire room went quiet. Which did not last very long as Lady Lucas tried to withhold the smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth.

“Mrs Bennet, Mr Darcy spoke onlyofMiss Elizabeth. He never replied to her set down after he deemed her appearance barely tolerable and not handsome enough to tempt him. There was something more, but I have quite forgotten… Oh, I remember. He accused her of being slighted by all the other men inattendance. She was sitting out for a set or two. Was it not so, Eliza?”

“True, I sat out for a set. There were too many ladies and not enough gentlemen.” Too late she realised it sounded like she was defending herself, not merely stating a fact.

Lady Lucas looked at her with pity in her eyes. “There, there, Eliza. I am certain you will soon find a beau. The militia has arrived in town. Colonel Forster has leased a piece of our land and is setting up his camp.”

“I am in need of fresh air this morning. Will you join me for a stroll around the garden, Eliza?” Charlotte enquired.

“Yes, what a lovely suggestion.”

Elizabeth sighed in relief. Thank heavens for Charlotte Lucas. She was the remedy to all evil, particularly on Wednesday mornings after an assembly. She was the best of friends, who knew exactly what Elizabeth needed.

“Thank you, Charlotte. You are my dearest friend.”

Charlotte smiled. “Thank you, Eliza. I hope your return from the assembly last night was uneventful.”

“Yes, and quick. I ran all the way.”

“I am not going to admonish you for running, as you already know very well a lady never does. But I must allow that I am astonished that your mother had not heard about Mr Darcy’s insults.”

“I deem it a fortunate turn of events that does not bear to be questioned too thoroughly. I do not believe she even noticed that I left the assembly, with Mr Bingley’s marked attentions to Jane to occupy her.”

“Are you very heartbroken by the handsome Mr Darcy’s harsh, and may I add unfair, judgments upon your appearance?”

“You thought he was handsome? Haughty, proud, and disagreeable is how I would describe him. Why, he hardly spoke to anyone outside his party, and he danced even less. He has two serviceable legs—he should apply them when he chooses to attend a ball, not stalk around the edge of the room like a peacock.”

“Mr Darcy has reasons to be above our company, Eliza. He owns half of Derbyshire.”

“The barren, unpopulated half?”

“Do not be ridiculous. His estate yields at least ten thousand pounds a year, and he is related to the Earl of Matlock.”

“Neither wealth nor connections make a gentleman handsome.”

“No, his tall stature, wide shoulders, and dark curls are his best features. Though I must admit that his cerulean blue eyes have an intelligent look about them.”

“So, he is pleasing to the eye, but what of his character?”

“I know not, but I would put up with a few warts and rotting teeth to be the mistress of a grand estate.”

“Now I am certain that you are jesting. You have a clever mind, Charlotte Lucas. Repaying his insults by smothering him with compliments. I might borrow your approach, should the opportunity arise. It will surely vex him no end…”

The sound of carriage wheels crunching on the gravel brought their conversation to an abrupt halt. Elizabeth turned and gasped at the sight of an approaching well-sprung black barouche. She ran towards the conveyance with Charlotte following at her usual sedate pace.

“Grandmother!” Elizabeth exclaimed when a dainty old lady alighted from the carriage. She wrapped her in a fierce hug and held her until her great uncle Henry cleared his throat.

“How good of you to come.” Elizabeth hugged her grandmother’s brother before ushering them all towards the house. “Papa will be so pleased.”