“Ryan! You have two choices, you drive straight to my house, or you drive home and I will be there to discuss this,” I said firmly.
“I’m not a toy! And I’m not hanging around you for money,” I gritted out.
Fucking Claire. She knew what she was doing when she began messing with him.
“You’re right, Ryan. You aren’t a toy. And I know money means nothing to you. I need to see you. My place or yours? The choice is yours.”
“If I come over, are you just going to tell me that it’s over? Because, if so, just do it now.”
“I want you to relax, concentrate on the road, and drive over here.”
Confident that he would drive over, I placed an order for a pizza for dinner. He needed to eat and relax. While I waited for Ryan, I went to my room and opened the black box that held the bracelet that would represent our collar. I ran my fingers along the clasp that would give him a visual reminder that I’m not going anywhere.
It was time. Ryan needed it...and I needed it.
When I opened the door, my boy stood a few feet away from me. His expression made my heart ache; he was wary and trying to stay just out of my reach. I stepped out onto the porch, closing the distance, and reached for his sleeve.
I pulled him closer to me and was pleased that I met no resistance. When he accepted my embrace so easily, I swallowed him up in my arms and clutched him to me. He ached too much and was emotionally drained to resist. I kissed the side of his head when I felt him put his hands on the small of my back.
“I love you, Ryan. Thank you for coming over, my boy,” I said to him while still in the embrace.
“I should stay away. I should know better to stay away. But I can’t. I love you, too. I can’t control the greed I feel for you. I want everything you are willing to give to me…even if that means I only get a little or have to share with her,” he mumbled.
I leaned back and framed his head with my hands and forced him to look at me.
“You are not going to share with anyone. All I want is you, Ryan. That’s it. I felt sick this afternoon when I discovered she showed up at your work.”
“How…how did you know?”
“She emailed me a picture.”
“I didn’t want to take the stupid picture, but she held this stupid customer service survey card over my head.”
“Ryan, relax, my boy.”
Just as we were heading back inside, the pizza was delivered.
“You ordered us a pizza?” he asked as he held the box, sniffing the edges.
“I did. You had a shitty lunch and I want us to relax and talk.”
“Good talk or bad talk?”
“Good talk, Ryan. A very good talk.”
While we ate, he filled me in on what Claire had said to him today. I was angry and irritated that she had the nerve and a connection to locate him. I had already been contemplating blocking her email address. But that could anger her further, and I’m not sure which is worse; me just having to manually delete her emails or her finding out I blocked her.
I needed Ryan under my roof. Enough was enough, and we just needed to have this conversation. No more running around and tiptoeing around the subject.
His bare wrist caught my attention as he was talking. That was another topic that needed tackling soon, but not before I settled him down and removed the stress of Claire from our lives…and get him under my roof.
“Ryan, I know you struggle with this topic, but I need for us to have the conversation—”
“Is it bad?” he interrupted me and set his crust down.
“No, Ryan. It’s not bad at all. It’s very good.” I paused to let him calm back down and motioned for him to continuing eating. “Ryan, I want you to live with me. I want to wake up with you and fall asleep with you.”
A million thoughts were evident of Ryan’s pale face.
