“Ryan, just like at home, I want you to relax. That is it, okay?”
I flicked my eyes to look up at him and nodded.
“Yes, Sir,” I replied.
On the floor between his feet always relaxes me. I don’t know how to explain that to myself really, except that between his feet, everything is okay.
“Relax, Ryan. I don’t want you in a stiff kneeling pose. Look at Jeremy; he’s in a relaxed pose.” Russell rubbed on my shoulders jostling me until I relaxed my back. “Good boy.”
While Russell and Daniel picked up their conversation about a new SUV that Daniel was considering, Russell’s hand stroked the top of my head. My eyes roamed around the living room, looking at other subs and their Doms. I had seen most of the guests at parties before, with the exception of the shark bitch.
Where was she now?
I could faintly hear her voice and casually turned my head to see if she was near the kitchen just to the side of us. There she was. She had a glass in her hand and as she spoke to a Dom that I recognized, she would glance at us every few moments.
I reminded myself that I was doing what she was doing; staring and not concentrating on who we were each with. I shook it off and glanced at the movement between Daniel’s legs. Jeremy had turned around and was nuzzling his face against Daniel’s crotch. It wasn’t long before Daniel had leaned back in the couch cushion to unbutton and unzip his pants. He pulled out his hard dick for Jeremy to occupy his time with it. For a few minutes, I watched as Jeremy quietly licked and sucked on Daniel. While Jeremy was busy, Daniel continued the SUV conversation, but moved his hand around Jeremy’s head, back or arms. There was nothing shallow or remotely demeaning about it. Daniel loves Jeremy.
Just like Russell loves me.
I could do that too.
Couldn’t I?
I glanced at the kitchen at the shark bitch. She’d already have her mouth of Russell if she had the opportunity.
What the fuck is the matter with me? I’m the one with the opportunity and I’m fucking it up. Russell told me that all he wanted me to do was relax. I know he wouldn’t expect to be blown in front of people, especially since I can barely blow him in private. I knew he wasn’t expecting it, but he’d be excited and proud that his boy could do it for him.
I could do this.
I wanted to do this.
I turned a bit so that I was facing him, but I kept watching Jeremy suck on Daniel. But so much of what drew me to watch wasn’t just the act of sucking, but how much appreciation and respect was so visible in the way Daniel treated Jeremy.
Russell touches me like that too. And right now, I was hungry for that from Russell. How do I start though? I was able to drag my eyes away from Daniel and Jeremy long enough to glance at Russell’s crotch. I reached out to touch the bulge that was straining the fabric of his pants but pulled my hand away and let it rest on his thigh.
Would he be mad if I did this?
Would I embarrass him?
I didn’t want to embarrass him. All of his friends were here, and many would see, or know that his sub blew him.
Would this be one of those things that would make him proud that I took the initiative to do something like this? Or was it bad to take the initiative? Jeremy had and he looked to be enjoying the rewards. My eyes had drifted to Jeremy and Daniel again but darted back to Russell when he closed his hand around my hand that rested on his thigh.
“Relax, Ryan. Don’t second guess yourself, my boy.” Russell leaned forward and kissed my forehead before murmuring, “I would love to feel your hand, Ryan.”
He wanted me to touch him. I swelled with pride. He was happy with what I had started to do. I stretched my left arm out on his right thigh and leaned my head against my arm and his leg. I didn’t want to be absorbed in watching Jeremy and Daniel.
I slid my right hand towards Russell’s crotch and moved my hand over it. He was hard and pressing against his pants. As the moments passed and I drowned everything around me out, I felt Russell’s loving hand stroke my head as it rested on his leg.
