I stopped on the driveway and put the SUV in park. Breakfast? I frowned and began to text himback.
Ryan: I didn’t. I just kind of wanted to get on the road and get over there so I can put all of this behindme.
Russell: I understand, but you need toeat.
Ryan: Okay. I’ll stop at a drive-thru before I leavetown.
Russell: Text when you arrive in L.A., drivesafe.
I stared at the text string for a moment. It wasn’t even 5:00 a.m. yet on a Saturday. What the hell was he doing up this early on a Saturday? I shook it off and made my way to the Dunkin’ Donuts drive-thru and got a half dozen donuts and a large coffee. That should hold me over until I gotthere.
All that I had to keep me company during my drive were my thoughts. I had replayed everything from our first few beating sessions, to all of the lessons and time spent in between. I really liked being around Russell. He knew so much about me, but I was still embarrassed about telling him that shit about why I didn’t like the feeling of cum on my skin. He probably had already put that kind of shit together on his own. He’s a smart guy with psychology as ahobby.
He could haveanyone.
Why doesn’t he have someone? I thought about this for miles and miles. He hosted tons of parties and knew lots of people. He’s played and had sessions with lots of people. Including me.Was he just toying withme?
Though, he said it himself; he was perfectly content with his life as it was. He loved to play and top in sessions, but he said it always ended with the session or party. He didn’t allow play partners into his masterbedroom.
I laughed out loud and broke the silence in my car, “The Master doesn’t let anyone in his masterbedroom.”
The effect of the laugh was short lived as I thought about how special he’s made me feel, even though I wasn’t special at all. Really, when it came down to it, he’s probably just doing the same things that he’s done for all the people he’smentored.
No, that didn’t feel right. He’d become a good friend and he’s the only one that knew everything about me. He knew all the shit, or most of it, and he still enjoyed being around me. Unless I was just a toy, or the nextproject.
As I pulled off the freeway at the exit ramp that would lead to my childhood hell, I had to push Russell out of my mind and focus on what fucked up shit was coming my way. I parked my SUV in the driveway behind my brother’s faded red pick-up truck. I glanced at the yard that I used to practice sliding in. Weeds were growing around the perimeter of the chain linked fence that separated the neighbor’s yards on the sides and the short brick retainer wall at the front sidewalk. The porch looked the same. The exact, fucking same. Two, beat to hell metal folding lawn chairs and a faded blue cooler between them. My stomach hurt. I hated being here. Before I got out of my SUV, I grabbed my phone and sent Russell atext.
Ryan: Hi, I madeit.
Russell: Glad you made it safely. Do what you need to do, but do not give much thought to what you hear from them. You are not the person that they made you believe that youwere.
He must have had his phone in his hand waiting for my text. I glanced at the time and it was just a few minutes after 9:00 a.m. He had been waiting for me. Or he was lining up a play session for tonight since he knew that I wouldn’t bearound.
I got out of the car and turned my phone over to silent mode. I left my overnight bag in the car because I wasn’t sure that I could stay overnight in this house again. As I walked up the porch steps, the screen door pushed open with Marie’s ass. She backed out of the house carrying three boxes stacked on top of one another and set them down on thecooler.
“About time your ass showed up,” she said tome.
“Nice to see you too,” I mumbled and walked away from her. I jerked my arm out of her grasp when she grabbed mybicep.
I opened the screen door and the scent that I had always been disgusted with, filled my nostrils. The plan for the house was that Chad and Marie were going to move out of their apartment and into the house. Mom had paid off the mortgage, so Chad and Marie had a free ride with it. They could work here and there and live in that god forsakenplace.
“Pussy,” Chad called from dad’sden.
From the entry way, dad’s den was just to the right and could be seen in its entirety from where I stood. Chad waited until I turned and looked at him and then he put his hands on hisbelt.
“Come on, Ry. For old time’ssake?”
I flipped him off and went into the kitchen. My mom was checking some drawers andmumbling.
“Hi, Mom,” Isaid.
No response. I spoke up, maybe her hearing is goingtoo.
“Mom.”
Chad came into the kitchen and threw his shoulder into my back. I shoved him away and glared athim.
“She doesn’t answer to ‘mom’ anymore.” Chad pointed to mom. “Elizabeth, the other mover ishere.”
