Holt
I’ll let you know if I need it.
Grayson
Can I have one of those beers?
Knox
No.
Grayson
Mean.
CHAPTER 3
Holt
“Ineed two monkeys to be sitting at the table in one minute!”
The giggles that follow make me grin. I put the finishing touches on dinner as a herd of elephants comes stomping down the stairs.
“Ooh-ooh. Aah-aah.”
“Ooh-ooh. Aah-Aah.”
Lauren and Leah tear through the kitchen with their arms swinging around like monkeys as they screech. I bark out a laugh at their silly antics.
At six and seven, my girls have blossomed into their witty personalities. Lauren’s the typical oldest child. She loves to be the mother hen, taking care of anything that needs a little extra love—me included.
Leah is my wild child. She’s got a creative soul full of compassion and conviction. She defends her sister with a fire my in-laws say I should try to tame, but I just can’t do it. I never want her to think she’s too much. I won’t ever make her feel like she has to change who she is for the sake of someone else.
“Grab something to drink. Dinner is ready,” I tell the girls. I fill their plates with pasta and set them in front of their places at the table, then I get a plate made for myself before I join them.
“Dad, Gramma said we need to take our Christmas decorations down. She said it’s tacky to have them up past New Year’s,” Lauren says.
I bite the inside of my lip to keep from saying something sarcastic in response. My in-laws mean well, and they’ve been incredible since Hannah died three years ago, but sometimes I wish they’d take a gigantic step back from our lives.
I needed them more than I could ever express right after Hannah’s car accident. I was a mess and barely had it in me to open my eyes. Now, we’ve settled into a solid routine and have slowly figured out how to live without our fourth person. It hasn’t been easy, but we’re in a much better place than we were.
I think Kathy is struggling with not being needed as much, but instead of asking to spend extra time with the girls, she’s taken to making snide comments about our life.
Lauren continues, “I told her we like having the Christmas lights up because Mommy loved them. She stopped talking about it after that.”
I reach over to run a hand down Lauren’s soft brown hair. “Mommy did love Christmas lights. How about we leave them up until the end of the month, and then we can decorate for Valentine’s Day?”
Lauren’s eyes light up. “Yes!”
“I love Balentime’s Day.” Leah grins, sticking her tongue through the small hole where her bottom tooth should be.
“Me too, baby girl.”
The girls tell me about their day with Kathy and Leonard. Today was the first day of the annual Ice Festival. I normally go with them, but a snowstorm is blowing through tonight, soI was out helping the road crew prepare. Our small Colorado town is used to snow, but we don’t always have the manpower to prepare for it. Finding volunteers is easier than calling people in from the city.
I try to stay present with the girls, but my thoughts begin to drift back to my rainbow girl. It’s been seven months since our night together, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her.
At first, I thought it was because she’s the first woman I’ve slept with since my wife died, but then, as time went on, I realized it’s just her.
