Evan chuckles at his wife’s enthusiasm and opens us up with prayer before diving into the purpose of our meeting. “So this might be a surprise to many of your friends and family, but obviously it wasn’t for you.”
Speak for yourself, Pastor.
He continues, “I’d like to hear from you two on how you knew you wanted to make this huge commitment to one another, and what you hope to gain from marriage counseling.”
What do I hope to gain? Until last week, I never considered myself in any marriage, period. Much less counseling for it. I think I’m hiding my discomfort until Owen whispers, “You okay?”
I nod but feel myself tensing even further. What am I supposed to disclose to this couple about the benefits of marriage when I’ve never seen any?
I’m saved from answering right away when Owen beats me to it. “I’ll be honest with you,” he says, taking my hand in his again and squeezing it once. “I didn’t know if it would ever happen for us. We’ve always been friends, though I’ve felt more… for a long time.”
His thumb runs along the length of mine, probably in an effort to keep me from freaking out, because Owen’s gone rogue and is telling Pastor Evan Lovett and his wife what I think is a semitruth here. One we did not agree upon telling him and something we haven’t ever discussed ourselves.
“I know it sounds crazy, but my injury, and then Brooke getting chosen for this show… it all feels meant to be. In some crazy way, I think this was the perfect chance for us to be… honest…” he continues, smiling at me like he’s remembering his part of our agreement the night we got engaged, though it must be fuzzy with all the meds he’d been on. It still sends shivers across my skin. It feels like a confession. One he wouldn’t have made if Evan and Blaire weren’t sitting with us now. “To be honest and committed to a future together. I hope meeting with you guys will help us work through anything that might hinder that future.”
Though I’m left with quite a few questions myself, I think that answer pacifies their curiosities until everyone turns to me.
“Ditto?” I say, hoping it suffices.
Everyone laughs. I am the funniest girl in this room. So very, very funny.
“Um…” I chuckle, too, feeling like a lunatic and deciding to take a page out of Owen’s playbook with some blatant and ugly honesty. “I don’t actually know if healthy marriages exist. I didn’t have, um…”
Owen squeezes my hand again.
“I didn’t have that. Growing up.”
Blaire nods, lips pinched pensively. I’m sure she’s heard a tale or two of Beth McBride’s marriage woes through the joint Honey Hill-Sugartree gossip mill. It’s a small community we have here, and my mom has certainly left her mark since we rolled into town over ten years ago.
“I guess I want to believe all of this. Me and Owen could be forever, but I’m not sure how…” I let my eyes flick to Owen who’s looking at me with a mixture of sadness and understanding. I know he gets it, but I wish I could be as hopeful and sentimental as he is. I wish I could be what he needs me to be, but I’m not even sure what version of myself would ensure he wouldn’t change his mind about us. “I’m sorry. That probably isn’t the answer you’re hoping for.”
“I want honesty, Babe. Always honesty,” he whispers, then does something I can’t quite compute. He leans in and gives me a tender kiss.
On the lips, people! In front of Jesus and his worker bees.
It’s quick and sweet, but it is the first time our mouths have touched in seven days. In case anyone is counting.
“Well,” Evan says, holding his wife’s hand, “I know Blaire and I appreciate your candor, y’all. Everyone brings baggage and bruises to a marriage, healthy examples or not. What we can do is give you tools for communication to work through that baggage and hold each other accountable to the honesty you clearly already have with one another.
“I know it will look interesting, since you aren’t technically supposed to have outside communication once you’re on the show, but apparently having fresh newlyweds onSuite Heartsis quite the story, so they’ve agreed to let us meet weekly with y’all for the entirety of your tenure there.”
“Thank you. We’re looking forward to it, ” Owen says, but I can’t say I agree with the sentiment. Baggage and bruises sounds a whole lot like therapy, which yeah… I know technically is whatwe’re doing here, but what does Owen need therapy for? He’s well-adjusted, has a college degree, a good job, a solid family and support system. I’m clearly the weakest link in this union.
“It’s so exciting,” Blaire muses dreamily. “Getting engaged and married and, now, being in this competition, of sorts, together. When do you leave?”
“Right after this, actually.” I smile, feeling as if this is a safe topic to discuss. This is the real reason we’re here.Suite Hearts. The competition will be fun.
I think. Ihope.
“I think y’all will have the very best time. Any thoughts on what the suite might be?”
I answer in the negative, though Owen and I have laughed about the possibilities over the last week. A submarine. A treehouse. A skyrise hotel room in Atlanta. We even considered the Atlanta zoo.
But when we finally leave the house and head to the drop-off location, signing in for our first day ofSuite Hearts,I don’t think anything could have prepared me for what we’ll be living in for the foreseeable future.
9
SLOW IT DOWN
