He passed over that opening, instead rushing to explain. “There have been rumors of some form or another for as long as I can remember. It probably started when I was in school. I don’t rightfully know. Regardless, once Gabriel passed and it was clear Cee wasn’t with child, Father demanded I wed. There were brief courtships. Nothing serious enough to be noteworthy by theton. Then there was Lady Charlotte.”
“Lady Charlotte James?” That must have been before I was moving in society. “Was she less of a shrew then?”
“She wasn’t—hasn’t… Her father—She hasn’t had it as easy as everyone thinks. Her father is cruel. Rumors must have made it back to him because when I went to speak with her father, he made it quite clear that he would never consent to a match with a molly. And that I wasn’t to speak to his daughter ever again or he would expose me.”
“So you never spoke to her again?”
“What else could I do? A few weeks later, she was wed to Lord James. And quite clearly unhappy about it. She may have been after me for my title and wealth, but I was using her as well.
“After that, the rumors only got worse. I’m not—I don’t behave the way a duke ought. I’m titled and wealthy, but I’m not popular. People are happy to gossip. And somehow Westfield, desperate for cash, heard the gossip. He came to me with an offer—an ultimatum. Wed his daughter, pay his debts, and he would keep his trap shut.
“It seemed that once she had finished caring for her stepmother’s illness, he no longer had a use for Juliet. She was another mouth to feed and a dowry to pay—one he had gambled away. He thought to use me to kill two birds with one stone. AndJuliet… You’re right, we would have suited. A marriage to her would solve my problems as well. And until she came to me to end the engagement, I’m afraid she wasn’t a person so much as a solution to a problem.
“I’m not proud of it, if you were wondering. I’m ashamed.”
“I didn’t mean to imply that I thought you were. And she never, not once, blamed you for the situation.”
“She wouldn’t. She’s far too kind to survive in my family. Mother and Dav would’ve walked all over her. Cee, too, probably. Though she would’ve been nicer about it.” He chuckled at the thought.
“She’s stronger than most people know. Her father…”
“Yes, that was a shock. I honestly thought she’d run to Gretna Green before she’d do something likethat.”
“Oh, she certainly would have. But Michael was licking his wounds in the silver hells,” I said, grinning at the memory of my scotch-soaked brother learning of his future wife’s plan.
“Well, I suppose she allowed me a little more dignity than the alternative.”
“What do you plan to do then? About a wife? And an heir?”
“Nothing. The estate and title will pass to some second cousin or other. I hope to outlive Mother and see Dav settled. But I’ve arranged funds for them if that turns out not to be the case. Cee as well, though I think Will may have been offended at the notion. And he’s the only contender for her affections in years.”
“So just… nothing at all?”
“Precisely. I’ve ruined one lady’s life and nearly done the same to another. I think that’s more than enough for one lifetime. I do not need to devastate a third.”
“And your legacy?”
“Legacy is hogwash made up by people who’ve built nothing, earned nothing, saved nothing, done nothing worthwhile intheir lives. All to make themselves feel better about the utter banality of their existence. Look at them in there,” he said, gesturing to the house. “They were placed where they are by luck, happenstance. They were born to privilege and power by chance and think they’ve earned it.
“My father wasn’t a good man. He wasn’t intelligent, or benevolent, or kind. He was manipulative and cruel. He was an utter simpleton who happened to be born the eldest son of a duke. And me? I wasn’t even born to be a duke. But here I am, merely because my elder brother couldn’t be convinced to stop fixing races. I don’t have some innate ability to lead because of it.”
He spoke with passion, with conviction. His hands danced to emphasize his point. I could watch him speak for hours about nothing and still be fascinated. There was a grace to his movements that was purely masculine. Nothing was delicate or tentative but smooth and sure. I wanted more, anything, everything he had to give me.
My stunned silence must have lasted too long because he flinched. “That was too much, wasn’t it? This is why I don’t speak.”
“No! No,” I insisted. “I’d never considered it. But you’re not wrong. My family is more than proof of that. Hugh is learning, and some day he may be a great viscount. But it’s not natural to him the way it is Michael.”
“I… There are a lot of things that society deems as the natural order. And things they’ve decided are unnatural. I think it’s mostly twaddle.”
“I can only disagree on one point.”
“And what’s that?” he demanded.
“I think you’re a great duke. At the very least, you’re a great brother and son.”
He scoffed. “Davina runs roughshod over me. Of course she likes me.”
“I suspect she would run roughshod over everyone.”
