Sonny deserves a father, and I unfortunately can’t give him that.
I’m one more click away from canceling my search when I read the slightly illegal words:Insurance Fraud.
I click onto the website out of sheer curiosity, but I quickly get sucked in. Insurance companies pay big when buildings are “accidently” set alight. Better yet, if expensive appliances are burned, they can be replaced, subject to the company’s terms and conditions…
I reach for my reading glasses and bring the laptop closer.
Chat anonymously here with a fire insurance consultant.
Not another anonymous person behind a screen…
But desperate times call for desperate measures. I glance over at Sonny, sitting quietly at the table completing his math homework, and hate that I can’t gift my little superstar the world. The T-shirt he’s wearing is holey around the elbows and under the armpits. He dresses every morning in clothes that are too small for him with no complaints, which makes this situation even more heartbreaking.
My paychecks disappear in an instant, going immediately to outgoing mortgage payments, expensive bills and taxes. I only have a couple hundred bucks left after all of those annoyingly essential payments have been made. And that goes toward groceries.
An alert pings on my computer—a message from the anonymous fire insurance consultant who is “at my service.” After explainingmy dilemma in more depth than necessary, he suggests something that sounds way too fucking good to be true.
The stove is old and needs replacing.
I use the stove, and the high heat triggers a fire.
Anonymous Fire Insurance Consultant:It doesn’t need to be a big fire. You can start the fire yourself, but make sure the stove is damaged enough for authorities—if they start sniffing around—to be unable to investigate the cause. Always hide your tracks. After reading through all of the fine print, I can see that the company has not advised users to replace their stove after so many years. This will work brilliantly for you.
Faulty stove.
Small fire.
Anonymous Fire Insurance Consultant:With a small child in your home, the company must legally compensate more. Your little boy could’ve lost his life because of their product. You’ll get a good payout. I’m sure of that.
After I thank the shady consultant, he wishes me luck and ends the chat.
There is no record of it, of course—what I’m about to do breaks multiple laws.
But after looking once more in Sonny’s direction, I realize that you can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs.
I close the laptop with a huff and pace over to Sonny. In an ideal world, I wouldn’t be plotting to set alight my own kitchen for insurance compensation purposes, but these unrealistic cost-of-living prices are leaving me with no other choice.
I just have to make sure Sonny stays well away in case something doesn’t go according to plan…
But it will be fine,I remind myself.Just a small stove fire. Nothing dramatic.
“Bedtime!” I announce, snapping Sonny out of deep concentration.
“Already?” he replies with a sulking lip. “I only just ate lunch.”
“I know, kiddo. But I have to take care of a few things and you were up bright and early this morning, weren’t you, waiting for Aunt Jessy?”
Sonny’s big brown eyes widen in excitement. “Does that mean I don’t have to finish math practice?”
“Just for the time being, sweet pea. We will tackle those harder questions later together, okay? After your rest.”
After I get my new stove and dishwasher.
And some more money in my accounts.
Sonny hops down from the dining room chair that’s still a little too big for him, and heads into his room, taking the toy plane with him. I stare at the plastic thing, wishing I could fly him out of the county for his ninth birthday.
Perhaps the compensation will give me enough money for us travel a little further next time. Maybe Europe? It blew Sonny’s mind the other day when I told him how far some of his “Borings” can travel.
