She had something on her mind, something she wasn’t telling me. “What did you do?”
Her eyes gave me a dull glare. “I make you breakfast in bed, and you immediately think I’m guilty of something?”
“Are you?” I asked, arching a brow.
Her chin lifted. “Maybe.”
I stared at her, a sudden horrible feeling worming its way into my gut. “I’m waiting.”
She reached over and plucked a piece of bacon off the plate. “We talked. Your father and I.”
I blinked. “You did what? When?”
Taking a bite, she swallowed the bacon. “It doesn’t matter. It’s done. And he agreed Rusty had to be taken care of.”
“Of course, he did. Rusty has turned into a liability for him, but you shouldn’t have gone to my father, little raven,” I snapped before I could stop myself, immediately hating my tone.
Her jaw went visibly tight, hurt flashing across her featuresbefore she could mask it. “I wasn’t going to let you make further debts with him. For once, let me protect you.”
A war raged inside me. Anger. Fear. Admiration, something dangerously close to awe. “I don’t think I have it in me,” I admitted. “My instinct to keep you safe…to keep you away from my father… It's too damn powerful. Fighting against it is like going into battle against myself.”
“You’re in no shape to be doing any fighting,” she muttered.
“This won’t keep me in bed.”
She looked at me under long, beautiful lashes, those light blue eyes troubled. “Are you mad?”
“I should be.” I huffed. “I am, but I’m also starting to see that you and I are more alike than I considered. We are both willing to do whatever it takes to keep those we love safe even if it hurts us. I can’t decide if that will be a problem for us in the future.” Hell, right now. I didn’t want her involved with my father on any level. Once he got his claws into you, he didn’t let go. Ever.
Her expression softened. “Let’s hope our future isn’t anything like our past.”
I took a sip of my coffee, not wanting to ruin the morning, but the idea of her alone with my father chilled my blood. He’s lucky he wasn’t home, or I’d be racing into his office, intentionally starting a fight. It would have to wait. My father and I would talk, but for now, I wanted to be in this moment with Kaylor.
I popped a strip of bacon into my mouth, a hint of a smile pulling at my lips as I chewed. “So you love me for real this time.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Of all the things you remember from last night, that’s the part that sticks?”
“I hadn’t realized how much I wanted those words to be true until you tried to undo them.”
She pursed her lips. “Hmm.”
“Say it again. I need to hear you say it.”
She angled her head to the side. “Not until you say them. If youwant to hear me tell you how much I love you, then you’re going to have to figure out how you feel first.”
This girl had no idea how thoroughly she’d wrecked me. “You know how I feel about you, little raven.” I loved her. Why was it so hard for me to say the words? They were just words, but really, they weren’t. They were heavy and filled with so much meaning. I couldn’t take them back, not like she had tried. Once they were spoken, they were out there.
They changed everything.
Was that what held me back? Was I worried we wouldn’t be the same?
Her hands looped behind my neck, breakfast forgotten. “But just like you, I need to hear you say it.” She tossed my words back at me.
“I don’t know if I can love. I don’t know what it feels like or if I’m capable of such emotions, but the closest thing I’ve come to love is what I feel for you. I can’t live without you. I don’t want you with anyone else.”
Her eyes glistened as she softly laid a hand over my heart. “You’re capable of love, Kreed. More than you might think. I know because I feel it.”
She made it sound so simple, so matter-of-fact, and maybe she was right, but I didn’t want to hurt. Hurting Kayor would kill me.
