I shook my head. “My devious little raven. I love the way your mind works, but I’m not sure how I feel about you teaming up with my father.”
She tipped her head, lips curving faintly. “Why not? You teamed up with my cousin.”
Damn her.
She wasn’t wrong.
And that was exactly why I didn’t like this at all despite her being onto something worth exploring.
Kaylor fellasleep on my lap not long after we got back to Brock’s house, her body curling up on the couch as her head rested against my thigh. One hand was tangled loosely in the fabric of my sweatshirt, her fingers twitching occasionally with whatever dreams played behind her closed eyelids.
The fire crackled low in the stone grate, its light flickering and dancing across her face, painting her features in soft gold. She might be safe in my arms tonight, but the danger was far from over.
My fingers hovered near her hair, the subtle heat radiating from her skin enticing me, but I didn’t let myself touch her. Didn’t letmyself take her comfort. I didn’t deserve it after how I’d acted like an ass earlier.
No one outside of my mother had ever told me they loved me, and I couldn’t figure out why Kaylor having those strong feelings toward me scared the living shit out of me.
They rattled my composure, not because I didn’t want them or because they weren’t what I’d been secretly hoping to hear but because I had absolutely no idea what to do with them. Love wasn’t built for people like me, for hands stained with blood and souls carrying too much darkness. It was too soft, too forgiving, too vulnerable. And I’d never been any of those things.
I should let her go. I should send her far away from me…from my father. If I really wanted to protect her life, wouldn’t she be safer without me?
And yet, it was either pure selfishness or ego that convinced my mind she was better off by my side. Besides, I couldn’t lock her up. Never again. I would never take her freedom or choice away again, regardless of how much I might want to protect her. There were other ways.
I stared into the flames, watching them consume the logs. My father’s ever-present shadow loomed over every good thing I dared to touch, corrupting it just by proximity. His “deal” burned in my mind. He’d made it all sound so reasonable, so logical: come home, go back to school, keep up appearances, and maintain normalcy.
Except nothing about it was normal. He was up to something deeper, a play I couldn’t see yet. He always was. And if she decided to return, Kaylor would be caught in his web again.
With the amount of security at Willows Estate, she should have been safer there than anywhere else in the world. The real problem wasn’t outside the gates, where it could be monitored and controlled. The problem was inside, sitting behind a mahogany desk and making chess moves with people’s lives. She’d be living under the same roof as the enemy.
Kaylor stirred slightly, mumbling incoherently, and then shewent still again, her breathing evening out. I brushed my thumb across her cheek, the simple touch grounding me, reminding me why I was doing any of this.
The floorboards creaked behind me, the sense we were no longer alone spiking in my blood. I glanced over my shoulder, seconds from dumping Kaylor onto the ground, when my eyes landed on a familiar face shrouded in shadows, but even with the cover of darkness, I knew my brother.
“Figures, I’d find you alone in the dark,” Raine muttered, his voice carrying a note of amusement until he got a good look at my face. “What did you do to fuck things up now?” he asked. He knew me too well.
“Not everything I do is fucking up. Just most of the time, at least in Dad’s eyes,” I mumbled, keeping my voice low so I wouldn’t disturb Kaylor.
“Fuck him,” Raine said easily, stepping into the circle of firelight. The orange glow caught on his features. “You’ve always been there when it actually counts, when shit gets real. That’s what matters in the end.” He dropped onto the opposite couch, stretching his long legs out and crossing them at the ankles. His eyes flitted briefly to Kaylor’s sleeping form and then back to me. “So are you going to tell me what has you so spooked? And don’t feed me some bullshit about our father. That’s baseline stress for you.”
I was quiet for a long moment, debating whether to tell him. I never would have considered telling the twins, but Raine would take it seriously. “What the fuck have I got to lose at this point?”
He shot me a crooked grin. “Except my patience, which, fair warning, is running thin tonight.”
I huffed and sank deeper into the couch, carefully checking to see she was still asleep. “Kaylor told me she loved me.”
Raine’s eyebrows rose, genuine surprise crossing his features. “And you’re still alive and breathing? Impressive. I figured your black heart would have shriveled up at the first outpouring of love from a girl.”
Oh, he thought he was funny. So much for thinking he would take this seriously. “It doesn’t matter. She took it back. Claimed it was a mistake and came out in the heat of the moment. That she didn’t actually mean it.”
“We all know that’s bullshit. The only person who doesn’t see how much this girl loves you is you.” He leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and lacing his fingers together. “Here’s the real question. Are you more afraid she didn’t mean it…or terrified she did?”
The question hung heavily in the air between us. I didn’t answer, couldn’t force words past the lump in my throat.
He sighed. “Sooner or later, Kreed, you’re going to have to deal with this shit head-on. Stop running from it. I’ve told you before she’s not going to wait around forever while you sort out your emotional damage.AndI know you didn’t ask for my advice, but you’re getting it anyway because someone in this family has to actually be an adult.” He looked me dead in the eyes. “You’re not going to find anyone more perfect for you than her. Period.”
“She’s the daughter of a rival crew,” I pointed out despite the argument being so weak. I was grasping at straws.
“And you’re the son of one,” he shot back.
