I just lost my job. My ex is threatening custody. I have no prospects, no plan, no idea how to fix any of this.
And on top of everything else, I’m sleeping with two of Jake’s best friends, like that’s somehow going to make my life less complicated.
Cole and Theo. Two men I have actual feelings for. Two men who make me feel wanted, seen, and like I’m more than just a disaster waiting to happen.
But what does that make me? A woman who can’t even handle her own life but somehow thinks she can handle a relationship. Two relationships?
Maybe Derek’s right. Perhaps I am being selfish. Maybe I’m putting what I want ahead of what Tommy needs.
A stable home. A mother who isn’t constantly struggling, someone who has their life together enough to provide actual security.
I’m not that person. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
The front door opens. Jake’s voice carries through the house.
“Rachel? You home?”
I wipe my face quickly. Try to pull myself together.
“In here.”
He appears in the living room doorway, takes one look at me, and his expression shifts from casual to concerned in half a second.
“What happened?”
“Doug, let me go. Insurance won’t pay out. Café might not rebuild.” The words come out flat. Mechanical. “I’m officially unemployed.”
Jake crosses the room and sits beside me on the couch. “I’m sorry. That’s rough.”
“And Derek called. He’s threatening custody again. Says I’m unstable. Says Tommy needs a better situation.” I laugh, but it comes out wrong. Broken. “He might be right.”
“He’s not right. He’s an asshole.”
“Maybe I’m an asshole, too. Maybe we’re both assholes and Tommy’s the one who suffers for it.”
“Rachel—”
“I don’t know what I’m doing, Jake. I came back here to start over, and I’m failing at everything. No job. No home of my own. An ex who wants to take my kid. I can’t get anything right.”
“That’s not true.”
“Isn’t it?” I look at him. “What have I done right since I got back here? Name one thing.”
“You’re raising a good kid. Tommy’s happy. He’s healthy. He’s loved.” Jake’s voice is firm. “That’s not nothing.”
“I need to figure this out,” I say quietly. “I need to get a job. Get my own place. Show Derek and everyone else that I can handle my life.”
“You will.”
“When? Because right now it feels like I’m drowning and there’s no shore in sight.”
Jake doesn’t answer. Because what can he say? That everything will be fine? That it’ll work out.
We both know life doesn’t work that way.
Later, after Jake’s gone to bed and Tommy’s asleep with Rex the dinosaur tucked under his arm, I sit in my room and stare at my phone.
Cole’s text from this morning is still there.The offer stands if you change your mind.
