"I'm sorry, okay?" the doctor tells me while looking straight into my eyes. "It was a rough night."
"It's alright." That's all I can say now. My throat is sore and dry. I swallow and try to speak again, but I still can't. Before the silence becomes unbearable, the ambulance comes to a halt and the backdoors are opened.
"Go, go, go!" someone says.
I'm being rushed on my stretcher so fast that the hospital walls look like an endless loop. One thing remains constant: the man keeping up with the stretcher. He's watching me.
Why is he watching me? Why is he here? Who is he?
The question that finally made it out of my mouth was none of the above.
"Is this a rescue?" I can hear my throaty voice; I can hardly speak.
He nods but doesn't say anything. He's starting to look blurry; I'm falling asleep. I'm sure this isn't death. It doesn't feel like death —it feels like rest.
Finally.
Chapter Four
Light green eyes.
Cassandra
I open my eyes and find myself in a hospital room.
At first, I feel my muscles numb. I try to move them, only to find them hooked to a bunch of cables that snake up above my head, where countless bags of solution hang in a variety of colors. A pair of monitors display some weird doodles and play strange noises.
To my right, a window lets in a warm summer breeze. The curtains used to be dark; now their color has faded, but that doesn't stop them from dancing to welcome me. It's a perfect picture, I can almost feel free.
Is this even real? How long have I been out? It's still night, so I guess it hasn't been long.
Through my eyes I try to take in all the information I can about this place; you know, to adapt, not only to the light but to the change of scenery itself. I try to gather and put together what I can to figure out where I am. The room, average in size, with pale light blue walls —almost a little too pale, you could mistake it for white—, is refreshing. It's also very quiet, except for the regular beep coming from the machine right next to me. Apart from that, I also have privacy: no nurses in sight. With all that info, I can almost confirm I'm not in the ICU.
A snort makes me look to the far left: the man is still here, awkwardly sitting on a chair; more like he died and fell on it. Maybe it looks that way because the chair is too small for him. He's sound asleep. He's wearing the same clothes, even the scarf.
Why is he still here?
I resume my information gathering. My eyes stumble upon a narrow door; I think it leads to the bathroom.
Oh, God.
I never thought I'd want so badly to see a toilet again in my life. After being locked away for three years, with nothing more than a bucket to do my business, which they cleaned every other week, I want to see it as much as I want to see the sun.
I'm determined to do it, so I try to get out of bed without a sound. But the machine has other plans— it starts beeping like crazy.
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!
The man jumps out of his slumber and runs to me.
"Where are you going? You shouldn't move yet, Cass… You don't need to go to the bathroom, they gave you a bag for that," he says.
I can't but look at him in awe and think, He knows my name? He must have said something else, but I was so focused on feeling human again, that maybe I imagined the part about my name.
"I'm sorry," I apologize automatically, without a thought. "I was just… I wanted to remember how it felt…" Feeling embarrassed, I try to change the subject quickly while I tuck myself back in. "Thank you for setting me free."
"I was just doing my job," he explains in a cold, distant tone. His voice sounds so familiar… I need to hear it again.
He looks nervous, jittery. He looks at the door, then at me, and then back at the door, again and again. That makes me wonder, that makes me alert. Why is he still wearing the goggles? He tucks me in, stares at me for a few seconds and then breaks eye contact. He seems troubled like he's fighting a thought. He strikes me as someone who's unconvinced right now. He lets out the loudest of sighs and marches towards the door. He grabs the chair that previously supported him and uses it to jam the doorknob.
