Was she like her mother? Her father had denied it when her mother had asked him whether he was seeing someone else. Told her it was all in her mind. The suspicion, the lies had driven her slowlyoutof her mind, until eventually she’d snapped. Cassiewasn’tlike her. She was stronger than that. Wasn’t she? She had to be. She had to stop thinking like this. Samuel needed her. She hugged him closer.
‘Silly Nana,’ she chastised herself as she laid him down on the changing mat on the work surface. ‘She needs to be a happy, smiley Nana, doesn’t she? That’s what you need, isn’t it, darling, not a mixed-up, miserable Nana?’
Smiling down at him, she eased him out of his babygro and removed his nappy. Tutting as she dropped it, she bent to retrieve it, then went to the utility to fetch a nappy sack. Depositing the sack in the bin, she retrieved her hand gel from the shelf. Obsessiveness was one thing. Sensible precaution was quite another, she assured herself, quickly cleaning her hands.
‘Shush, darling, Nana’s coming,’ she called reassuringly across to Samuel, who was working himself up to a good bellow.
She was grabbing the antibacterial spray from the cupboard when Adam yelled behind her, ‘Cassie! What the fucking hell are you doing?’
Thirty-Six
Kimberley
Kim clutched the crying baby to her chest and watched the scene playing out before her with morbid fascination.
‘Don’t be so ridiculous,’ Cassie laughed, bewildered. ‘I might have been a bit distracted recently, which is no surprise if you take into account the fact that my son died, but I wasn’t about to spray cleaning fluid anywhere near the baby. I’m not completely stupid, Adam.’
Kim winced at the reference to Josh asherson. That was just cruel. She glanced from Cassie to Adam, who’d obviously also picked up on it. He looked utterly crushed. ‘Well what the bloody hellwereyou doing then?’ he asked.
‘I dropped the nappy on the floor.’ Cassie looked at him as if she really didn’t get it. ‘It was the tiles I was about to wipe, not the work surface.’
‘Jesus Christ…’ Heaving out a sigh, Adam glanced away from her. The look in his eyes as he met Kim’s was somewhere between despair and desperation.
‘I was only cleaning the mess up. It’s not a criminal offence, Adam. I don’t understand what it is I’m supposed to have—’
‘He was screaming his head off,’ Adam grated, levelling a furious gaze back at Cassie. ‘You left him balanced on the work surface.’
‘Only for a second.’ Cassie’s voice quavered. ‘I didn’t move away from him long enough for him to roll over. I do have some experience of caring for a baby, Adam. Which actually you don’t,’ she pointed out defensively,
Kim’s gaze shot to Adam, who looked as if Cassie had punched him. He didn’t retaliate. Dragging his wounded gaze away, he kneaded his forehead hard, then turned towards the hall.
He met Kim’s eyes as he approached the kitchen door. He looked so tired. Bone weary. And so, so angry.
‘Kim?’ Cassie said, looking at her. ‘You don’t seriously think I would ever do anything to harm Samuel, do you? I would die before hurting him.’
‘No, I…’ Kim hesitated, furrowing her brow.
Cassie looked at her uncertainly. ‘Kim?’
‘I should go,’ Kim said. ‘Samuel’s upset.’
‘But you’ll come back?’ Cassie asked, her expression fearful. ‘Or I could come over to you, as we agreed. Tomorrow possibly?’
‘Maybe.’ Kim took her opportunity to back away as Samuel grew more fractious. He was probably starving. She’d brought a feed with her, but a tactical exit might be best.
‘Here, let me take him,’ Cassie offered, taking a step towards her.
‘No,’ Kim said quickly. ‘I have to go, Cassie. I’ll—’
She was interrupted by a loud crash. She whirled around, reaching the hall before Cassie, to find Adam quietly cursing and shaking his hand. There was blood dripping from it. Kim’s heart caught in her chest. The mirror was smashed, broken glass sprinkled around like silver confetti. The blood had dripped onto the carpet, rich red against the pale cream. That wouldn’t go down well.
‘Adam?’ Cassie said shakily behind her. ‘What in God’s name have you done?’
Adam laughed cynically. ‘Broken a cardinal rule, Cas,’ he said, his eyes blazing. ‘Made a fucking mess.’ Shaking his head, he turned to yank open the front door.
‘Adam!’ she called frantically. ‘Come back. You can’t—’
‘Enough, Cassandra!’ Adam exploded. ‘For pity’s sake, can you not just stop!’ His shoulders tense, he hesitated for a second, and then strode out, slamming the front door behind him.
