“What? What are you talking about, Brooks? Why would I hate you? I could never—”
“You could, and you will,” I say assuredly.
He sits up and scoots next to me, attempting to cradle me in his arms again. I brush him off, though it kills me to do so. I will give in if I find myself wrapped up in his security.
“Why are you doing this?” he asks me, hurt etching his features. “You’re acting like my feelings for you are conditional, or disposable, or something.”
I can’t. I can’t look into those piercing blue eyes of his, those currently so filled with hurt and confusion, and keep something so vital from him. He has to know. He deserves to know, even if it damages my career that I’ve worked so hard for.
“Gordy”—I suck in a breath—“is a junior, isn’t he?”
Evan’s brows furrow. “How did you know that? Yes, he is. He told me he always hated having the same name as his father.
“Marlin…”
The concern lines on his forehead grow deeper. “Yes. Brooks, how do you…?”
“Ican’tsay,” I tell him pointedly, fixing him with a look. “I’m sure you understand what that means, right?”
He takes a minute, looking lost in thought.
“Oh my fucking god,” Evan finally gasps, rearing back. “You know what happened to him, because youknowhim.Thatexplains the look and all the weird shit Gordy was saying. You’ve been treating him.”
I don’t reply. I just let my gaze fall downward while I bite my lip.
To my utter shock, Evan respects my oath, and doesn’t press me further. Instead, he wraps his arms around me, and this time I don’tback away. “That’s why you were able to calm him down so much, while I got the ambulance.”
I nod. “And for what it’s worth, I truly do believe he wants to make amends with you, Evan. I don’t feel like he’s just doing it to tick off a box on his healing checklist. Before I even knew it was you, he—well, let’s just say, he wasn’t lying when he said the guilt eats him up inside.”
“You don’t have to tell me more,” Evan reaffirms. “Just knowing that helps. And, for the record? I don’t hate you, Brooks. I love you. I watched how you handled whatever it was he was going through. You’re good at what you do. I know you had your doubts after what happened with Kai, but you’re so, so fucking good.” He kisses my neck.
“Of all the people,” I huff, “how did this happen?”
“Especially lately, I’m inclined to believe that people are put in our paths for a reason, so they can help change our future. I know you changed mine. You’re like my compass.” I feel his smile on the sensitive skin of my neck.
“And you mine,” I tell him. “I can’t believe I didn’t want to date you at first, because I was afraid of falling and getting my heart broken. If anything, you’ve held it carefully and made it whole. You treat me like I’m royalty.”
“That’s because you are, Princess,” he teases, grinning at me. “We’re going to get through all this together, I know it. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
“Maybe not tonight, because honestly, I’m exhausted, and I think it’s from all my emotions on high… but I think I’m ready,” he admits vaguely.
“For what?” I ask, proud of him already for recognizing and acknowledging his emotional state.
“For you to love me whole. I want you to make love to me, Brooks. I want you to be the one to take me next time. I’m ready.”
“Oh, babe,” I reply, cupping his cheeks and pulling his face towards mine so I can rest my forehead on his. “I will give you whatever you want, when you are ready to be reckless.”
He grins. “I fucking love you.”
“I love you too, Evan Waters.”
The next morning, I wake up startled by just how coarse and minimal Snarf’s fur is, as I pet him while he sleeps on my chest. When I pry my eyelids open, I find I’m not in my bed at all, and it’s not Snarf I’m patting—it’s Evan’s cheek.
He’s adorable—this hypermasculine man all cutesy, sleeping withhisface onmychest for a change. Usually it’s me, and the blessed thing is, he doesn’t ever complain about the drool that ends up crusted in his light chest hair. In fact, he doesn’t ever really complain at all about anything.He really is like this giant teddy bear, all wrapped up in a grizzly exterior.
The man laying on me right now, snoring like he’s having lumberjack-with-a-chainsaw dreams, seems pretty damn happy these days—well, aside from yesterday. Feels odd to hear him tell me that I’m the cause of it, that I’m his compass. Feels so darn weird to be loved as thoroughly as he’s loved me. Feelsthe weirdestto hear him call mehis, as if I'm someone worth keeping, and knowing he means it… because when this mandoessay something, you know darn well he's being earnest.
