“Everyone knows shifting makes you horny, Sully. This is different.”
“Different how?”
He held eye contact for several long seconds. It looked as though he was trying to decide whether to say something or not. He looked away from me but spoke clearly. “My asshole is slick, okay?”
I didn’t know what to say. I had no clue where to start, or what he needed to hear. Not only that, the second I heard his words, my gums started to itch, and my fingertips tingled. My arousal was so intense, I could hardly breathe. I felt like I’d been hit in the chest. I felt like I felt that time I fell off the swing. I sat on the bench, digging my nails into the seat so hard, my knuckles went white.
Do not partially shift. Do not shift at all,I begged myself.
“I’m going inside,” he said. I was about to offer to come with him when he added, “You stay outside, okay? I need to be alone. I can’t be around you right now.”
I heard the door close, and the deadbolt slid shut. I was a desperate, confused mess. Jules was in heat. I was hurt that he didn’t want to be around me, and I was almost insane with lust. I wanted to rip the cabin door off by the hinges. I eyed the door and felt a calm sense of certainty that I could do it. I could break into the cabin and get to him. That was what I wanted. I wanted to be with him. I wanted him like nothing I’d ever wanted. I wanted him in a way that was crazy. Insane. Unreal. I wanted him in a way that was beyond reality.
I wanted him in a way that was magick. That’s what it was.
I was reacting to Jules as an animal. I was an animal, that was true, but I was also a man. I was still me and Jules was still Jules. He was still my first and best friend and right then, he wasn’t himself. I tried to slow my thoughts down. To think calmly. Rationally. I made a list of the things I knew. Only omegas went into heat. That much I knew for sure. Assholes getting slicked up and being feverish from arousal; those were things that only happened to omegas. I understood that. What I couldn’t wrap my head around was that it meant Jules wasn’t a beta.
How the hell could Jules not be a beta? How was it possible?
And then I remembered, I wasn’t one either.
That sobered me. It snapped me out of it, and for the first time since the rise of the full moon, the fog lifted, and I was able to think clearly. I tried to remember everything I knew about omegas. They took their name from the Greek letter. The twenty-fourth letter of the alphabet. The last letter. They were said to be nurturing and caring. They were known to be sensual. Devastatingly sexy. Irresistible even. There were plenty of stories about alphas becoming all kinds of stupid in the name of an omega. Plenty. It was well known. Their heats were mysterious. Usually activated by a particular phase of the moon. I’d heard that some went into heat every quarter, and some went into heat every month. I’d heard heats could last anywhere from hours to days. I’d grown up hearing disparaging remarks made about omegas in heat. I’d seen it firsthand with the way our pack omegas were treated. Like possessions. Like things.
I broke into a cold sweat when I thought of that for Jules. I felt fear when I thought about it. Real fear. I didn’t want that for him. I didn’t want a life for him that involved being treated as less-than. I didn’t want it for anyone, but I couldn’t bear it for Jules. I couldn’t stand it.
“I won’t allow it,” I said aloud. As I said it, the hair on the back of my neck stood on end and my fingertips tingled, and a split second later, my claws extended. They shot out of my nail beds so fast, they made the same sound as a knife being unsheathed. I stared down at them with a sense of wonder and disbelief, but by the time they retracted, my feeling of fear had changed to relief.
I was strong. I’d always been strong. I’d always been stronger than I’d let on. I don’t know why I felt a need to hide it, but I always had. I’d hidden my true strength from everyone. Even myself. But I was strong. And I was an alpha. I realized right then that if I had to spend every day from that moment until the last day of my life making sure no one mistreated Jules, I’d do it. I’d do it gladly. I wouldn’t think twice about it.
That thought calmed me, but the next one did just the opposite. Jules was in heat. He needed help. Yet again, I felt fury toward Dalton. I felt fury toward my mother too, and even toward Mrs. O’Malley.
For fuck’s sake, Mrs. O, a heads-up might have been nice.
As it was, there I was, a brand-new alpha stuck in a cabin deep in the woods with an omega in his first heat. I didn’t know how to help him.
Did I need to find a girl for him?
Would a human girl do, or did he need a shifter?
If he needed a shifter girl, we were shit out of luck. I didn’t even know where the nearest pack was, and I was damned if I was going to take him back to our fucked-up pack. The thought of Dalton or The Brothers anywhere near Jules made my skin crawl and red-hot rage pound in my head. The thought of Jules with any of our pack omegas was very slightly better, but it still made me feel physically sick.
My heart clenched in fear. Jules was going to need help. Real help. I’d heard whispers about what happened to omegas who didn’t have sex when they were in heat. Some had been seriously injured. I’d even heard rumors of omegas dying of heats that weren’t broken.
I got into such a state thinking about it, I started to pace. I undressed and shifted. I patrolled up and down anxiously. The shift felt different. Unstable. I kept losing it and shifting back to human form. I tried over and over, but I couldn’t keep my wolf form for more than a few seconds at a time. When I took a few steps away from the cabin, my heart squeezed uncomfortably. I felt like I was having a heart attack or something. I couldn’t breathe. I had to stay close to the cabin. I had to stay close to Jules. It wasn’t just that I wanted to. I had to. I walked around the cabin, shifting back and forth. Eventually, the only thing that relieved me was tracing my hand along the exterior wall and stopping now and again to lean my face against it.
I could hear Jules inside. He was whimpering. Moaning. I could tell he was trying not to, and that only made it sound worse. I did another manic lap around the building. That time, I stopped and pissed on all four corners of the cabin.
My wolf knew why.
By then, I knew why, too.
“Sully.”
My ears pricked up. It was well past midnight. I’d given up on shifting and had gotten dressed again. I’d stopped pacing. I was sitting on the porch, leaning against the front door, trying to get some sleep. I bolted upright. He’d said my name. I heard it. It was muffled, but I’d heard it.
“Sully,” he said again. Louder that time.
“I’m here, Jules. I’m right outside.”
