The set is impressive as usual. A plush black couch with black and pink throw pillows is at the center of the room. There’s a huge white rug situated under the couch that I’m guessing is as soft as it looks. I’d probably appreciate it all more if I were in a better mood, but even still, I can acknowledge how hot we’re going to look when all is said and done. We await instruction from the photographer, Simon, who looks as upset to be here as I feel. His artistic eye is amazing, but he’s a bit abrasive and definitely impatient. It’s why he hates when Wes and I work together; he hates fun.Good news, Simon. I hate fun today, too.
A few hours later, we’re done. Normally, I’d stick around to see some of the unedited shots, but I just want to get home to Darío. A quick shower removes the glitter, and I hastily change back into my clothes. As I’m leaving the dressing area, I run into Shawn. I was really hoping to avoid him. He gestures to a sitting area, and I follow, trying not to be angry at him. I know it’s not his fault, but I can’t help it.
“How are you holding up, Harlan?” The genuine look of concern on his handsome face has me softening to him immediately. I shrug, not sure he really wants to have me go into complete meltdown mode. I usually save that for Wes and Penny. “I’ve retained Mariella Sanchez, who is one of the best immigration lawyers in the state.”
It seems like he’s waiting for a verbal response, so I mutter, “Thank you.” He studies me for a moment longer. I try not to squirm under his scrutiny. His attention is intense, though.
“I think while this all gets straightened out, I’m going to rebook your winter travel to California since we don’t know what’s going to happen. If you have to go, we’ll work to getyou back to Brooklyn as soon as we can. Unfortunately, this administration is really complicating the process. Once we know more, we can reevaluate your calendar,” he tells me. I want to be angry, but it makes sense. The travel shoots are planned months in advance.
“That makes sense,” I concede. “I appreciate everything you’re doing for me, Shawn.” He brushes off my thanks before he pulls me into a quick hug, and I blink back unexpected tears. I shouldn’t be surprised by his affection, but it feels like too much right now.
“Go home to Darío, and try to relax. We’ll know more in a few days, and we can go from there.” He walks off, and I prepare to leave before I run into anyone else. Before I go, I send Penny a quick text to see if she wants to meet up later this week.
Me
The shoot is done and I’m leaving. I can’t be arsed today. Just ran into Shawn who promised he’s going to do whatever he can to help. Fancy going for a drink this week?
Pen
You know he will. No one here can do what you can do. Love you. Yes to drinks.
Me
Dare leaves for LA in a couple of days, so we’ll go out while he’s gone. RecklessX?
Pen
Fuck yes.
Me
Perfect. Love you.
As much as I want to go home, I worry about dragging Dare down with my anxiety. He’ll want to talk about it, to try to find a way to fix it. Unfortunately, there isn’t anything we can do. He needs to focus on baseball. The Scorpions are doing so well this year, and I’d feel terrible if my situation caused him to be distracted. Normally, I would talk to him about anything and everything. He’s my best friend. But this. This is different. It feels like no matter what words I say, they will sound like goodbye. And how do you say goodbye to your heart? To your home? That’s what Dare is. My heart. My home.
Even though we have no idea what’s going to happen, I have this uneasy feeling about it. The goal was always to stay here. The UK hasn’t felt like home in so long. Maybe it never really did. I found everything that had been missing when I came to Brooklyn. Between my friends, the job of my dreams, and Dare, I couldn’t ask for more. I am the luckiest boy.
Parking my car on the street, I sit for a moment to take in the bustle of our neighborhood. The tree-lined pavement, the honking horns, neighbors sitting on their steps having conversations. At that thought, Allegra, our eighty-nine-year-old neighbor, walks outside to water her plants. She’s one of the first people I met when we moved in. She’s fiercely independent, a little moody, and an absolute delight to be around.
Before I exit my vehicle, I reach into my glove box, where I keep a supply of Twizzlers for my favorite neighbor. Locking my car, I walk to her building and smile at her despite the scowl on her face. “Hello, Allegra. You look beautiful today.”
“Fuck off, Harlan,” she snipes, as she continues to water her flowers. “You’ll never believe what Ethel told me today at the center.” Allegra walks several blocks over to the senior center a few times a week. You’d be astonished at how much gossip a bunch of elderly people can generate. I live for these moments, though.
“Sit with me,” I insist, as I plop on her steps. I reach my hand up to help her, but she shoots daggers at me, and I laugh, unperturbed. “These are for you. Have one and tell me what that wretched Ethel said to you. If you need me to come with you next time, I can tell her to leave you alone.”
“You think I didn’t tell her? Please. She told me I’m too old to live alone. Said that I should move in with Anthony and Grace.” I do my best to look properly horrified. “See! I told her that just because she lives with her kids, doesn’t mean that I need to. I have you. And Tony comes a few times a week. Jealous old bat,” she grumbles.
“Maybe she’s just worried about you, Allegra,” I offer, as she tears into her bag of Twizzlers.
“She’s just a nosy busybody. She’s not worried,” she huffs. “Tell me about your day, baby. Did you take pictures with that handsome Wesley?”
Taking a moment, I consider whether I should tell her about my visa. I decide I should, because if I leave, she’ll need to make sure someone can get her medicine from the pharmacy. Dare will help whenever he can, but with how often he’s gone, she’ll need a backup plan. Her grandkids live upstate, and her son and daughter are in Westchester, so she doesn’t have anyone super close. I give her all the details I know, which admittedly aren’t a lot currently.
“You know my take on this government,” she snaps. “Tony knows some good lawyers if you need one. You say the word, baby.”
“I’ll let you know, I promise. Shawn says he has a lawyer looking at it, and as soon as I know what’s going on, I’ll stop over and let you know.” I go to stand, ready to be inside with Dare to decompress from this day.
“You’re a good boy, Harlan. I’m going to go inside and call Tony, just in case.” She kisses my cheek and stands to go back inside, muttering about our broken government.
