The word triggered something primal. Images of being trapped in the hospital that night. Questions. Police. Handcuffs. “No. No ambulance.”
He looked uncertain, torn between respecting my wishes and doing the responsible thing. “Okay. No ambulance.” His thumb brushed my cheekbone, the gesture so tender that it made my chest ache. “You’re trembling.” Without hesitation, he shifted, wrapping an arm around me and pulling me against his side.
The trembling stopped. Just like that. Like his presence was some kind of antidote to whatever poison was coursing through my veins.
“Better?” His voice rumbled through his chest.
I nodded, not trusting my voice. How could I explain that his arms felt like the only safe harbor in a hurricane?
“The last time you were here,” he said quietly, “was the night it happened.”
Somehow, he’d pieced it together. Maybe from the way I’d frozen in the foyer like a deer in headlights. A very traumatized deer with possible homicidal tendencies.
“I’m remembering things,” I admitted.
Ryker stilled. Even his breathing seemed to pause.
“Still just fragments. Pieces that don’t make sense. Or maybe they make too much sense.”
“They don’t have to make sense right now.” His arm tightened around me. “You don’t have to figure itall out tonight.”
The patience in his voice nearly undid me. All this time, he’d been pressing for details, and now, when the memories were finally surfacing, he was telling me to take my time. My well-being mattered more than his need for answers. At least right now.
“What if the fragments are showing me something I don’t want to see?” The words tumbled out, interrupting my confession. “What if I wasn’t defending myself? What if I chose it?”
“Then you had a reason.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because you’re here, shaking in my arms at just the memory of it.” His lips pressed against my temple, and I closed my eyes to savor it. I wished we could just lie here forever. “Monsters don’t shake, Faith. They don’t break apart, remembering violence. They relish it.”
“But what if I could have walked away?”
“I know that whatever happened that night, you did what you had to do.”
“You can’t possibly know that.”
“I can.” He shifted so he could lock eyes with me. “Because I know you. The woman who faces her demons every damn day and keeps going. That’s who you are.”
Tears burned my eyes. Dammit. I was not going to cry. I was not going to?—
“You survived,” Ryker continued, his thumb brushing away a tear I hadn’t realized had fallen. “That’s all that matters. You came to me that night, covered in blood, and you survived. Whatever you had to do, whatever choice you made in those woods, you’re here. With me. That’s everything. And you don’t have to carry this alone anymore.”
He pulled me tighter against him, letting me rest my cheek on his chest.
“God, Faith, I want to keep you safe. Always.”
I turned in his arms, looking up at him again. In the dim light from the hallway, his features were all shadows and sharp angles.Beautiful and dangerous. Like a particularly attractive warning label.
“What if I’m not safe to keep?” I whispered. “What if I destroy everything I touch?”
His hand came up to cradle my face, his touch impossibly gentle. “Then I’ll gladly let you destroy me.”
“Ryker—”
“No, listen to me.” He shifted, turning my body so I was facing him fully. “You think whatever happened that night in the woods changes anything? Faith, that man was a predator.”
Footsteps pounded up the stairs.
