They’d be tearing me a new one if they knew what we were doing on this field last night.
“Everyone is allowed their secrets. His happens to be a call at night,” Ryker added as I dropped off the bars. He took them next while I drank from my canteen, trying not to think of my secret in the lab.
Well, secret to some. Roys knew now.
I wiped the sweat from my brow and fell to take a break. The cool grass soothed my skin but not my mind.
I wish you were dead.
I dropped my arms over my eyes, which suddenly burned.
I thought she had left me alone. After Roys and I were out here, I didn’t think of her. There were no dreams. I woke up for breakfast, and she wasn’t there to remind me of anything. Half of the survey team left with half of us. She stayed behind, so did we, but I didn’t see her, so she was gone.
But then there she was. Secret — that was all Ryker had to say and Maddy burrowed so deep into my brain I couldn’t pluck her out without plucking out my sanity, too.
Getting up, I stopped Zavir’s rapid running by joining him. Exhausting myself to death made my brain fuzzy. A fuzzy brain meant no Maddy, no past, just pushing my body to move, move, move until I literally dropped. I kneeled under the suns, hands shaking to get my canteen.
“You shouldn’t push yourself like that.” Roys balanced on the heels of his feet to get the canteen and open it. He offered the water.
After inhaling half of it, I asked, “Keeping an eye on me?”
“You started it.” He grinned at my glare, then went on, “And there’s no one else to keep an eye on.” He held out his hands, signaling to the empty lot. I hadn’t noticed everyone leaving. “You have a lot of energy for someone who was up half the night.”
“Guess you weren’t enough to exhaust me.”
He patted his chest over his heart. “Ouch.”
“You could exhaust me later, preferably through another sweat-inducing exercise.”
“Sure. We can run an extra lap or two tonight,” he teased, offering a crooked smirk that suited him far too well.
“Fucking, sweetheart, I’d like for us to have a round of passionate fornication.”
Roys actually laughed, a deep sound rumbling in the back of his throat. “You are the least passionate person I’ve ever met.”
“Passion isn’t inherently romantic. It’s the intensity, and I am nothing if not intense.” I dropped the last of my water on the back of my neck, not missing the way Roys stared and loving every moment of the attention. His cheeks took on a slightly darker shade of red upon realizing I had caught him.
“Intensely annoying, perhaps," he said.
“Intensely hot, by your standards, you were practically drooling over me last night.”
“Clearly a bout of insanity on my part.”
It was my turn to place a hand over my heart and mock, “Ouch.”
My chest warmed, having got a second laugh out of him. He didn’t laugh often, showing little more than what a captain should be, save with me. In those rare moments of lust, and apparently, joking around. With me.
I liked it.
I stole the canteen from his belt. He said nothing as I drank from his, washing the sensation away. When I stood, so did he. My exhaustion hadn’t quite settled, and I swayed, feeling lightheaded. Roys’ hand landed on the small of my back. I glanced down at him, finding concern there, attention that made my breath hitch.
I nudged him aside. “Ew. Don’t play sweet with me. That’s not my thing.”
“Believe it or not, but I’d stop anyone from falling over after exhausting themselves.”
“Anyone? Really?”
“There are exceptions. Admittedly, on one of your bad days, which are most days, you would be an exception.”
